The Brendon Urie Collection: Brendon Urie x Reader (mostly)

Breathe with me

This was a request from an anon on tumblr ❤️
tw kinda ???

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"Come on babe, are you ready to go?" Brendon yells up to you as you finish your hair, nearly ready for a date night with him. It had been so long since you two had been able to go out, he was always working so much, and touring for the better part of the year, but he was finally back home with you and he couldn't wait to take you out.
You leave the bathroom, turning the light off on your way out, and walk down the stairs where Brendon stood, leaned up against the wall and scrolling through something on his phone.
He notices your presence beside him and looks up at you. A smile spreads across his face. He shakes his head incredulously and laughs.
"You're the most stunning woman in the whole world, how the hell did I get you to agree to marry me?"
"Mmm probably the Urie charm." You quip back. He laughs and agrees, grabbing your hand and leading you to the car.
He puts the address to the restaurant into his phones GPS and heads off down the street.
You skim through the radio stations until a song catches your ear, and the two of you begin to loudly sing along.
You're making eachother laugh and singing (more like screaming) most of the drive, so maybe that's why neither of you notice the person behind you coming up way too fast, not even attempting to stop before colliding with your back bumper.
All you hear is the thumping of your own pulse in your ears, your eyes open quickly and land on your husband in the driver's seat, head slumped forward.
Your eyes widen in horror, fearing the worst. You can only let out a scream. "BRENDON-"
You wake with a gasp, heart pounding, body sweating yet freezing, and shivering. A sick feeling swirled in your stomach as hot tears rapidly filled your eyes, spilling down your cheeks. Your thoughts were running at a mile a minute. You simultaneously wanted to run to the living room as to not wake Brendon, and wanted to wake him so he could hold you and make you feel better. You couldn't do either of those things, though. You felt frozen in place, panic attack now officially in full swing. You honestly felt like you were dying, like you did every single time.
You sputtered shaky, ragged breaths in and out of your aching chest, desperately hoping to try to calm yourself. More tears fell now, partly out of frustration, as you continued to feel worse by the second. You started to feel lightheaded.
Brendon began to stir beside you in bed. As soon as he comes to and realizes something's wrong, he's bolted upright. You cry harder, feeling guilty for accidentally waking him, even though you really needed him. He slowly rubs a hand up and down on your lower back, and leans over to kisses the top of your head sweetly before speaking.
"Hey baby, darlin', it's ok, I'm here, you're gonna be ok." He assures softly. "Just breathe with me alright? In... out... in... out..." he repeats, breathing deeply until he notices your breathing start to even out. His hand continues to lightly stroke your back.
"That's it, just like that. That's my girl. You're doing so good, y/n" he murmurs softly. You can only provide him a sniffle and a shuddering sigh.
His heart ached for you, he knew all too well how you were feeling. He dealt with anxiety and panic attacks as well, and you had helped him through many episodes, but it was so different when you went though it yourself. He wished he could take it away, he would even put it on himself if it meant you never had to feel this way again. He hated seeing you like this, especially knowing he couldn't really fix it.
Your tears were still falling fast, and Brendon was doing his best to wipe them away with the hand that wasn't rubbing your back.
"What's on your mind sweetheart, why'd this happen, hm? Bad dream?"
You nod slowly.
"I'm sorry, love. Do you want to talk about it?" He asks softly, kissing your head again.
You shake your head in response, you weren't ready to talk yet, you just needed to know for now that he was there and that he wasn't going anywhere.
"That's ok, we don't have to. I'm here when or if you want to, ok baby? I'll always be here for you." He says, looking into your eyes with his big, soft, brown ones.
You nod as he takes your hand into his and rubs the top of it with his thumb.
"I'm sorry" You whisper after a few moments of sitting quietly.
"What for?" He asks you, genuinely confused.
"For waking you up, for having to deal with me.." You trail off, slightly embarrassed.
"Hey, y/n, there's nothing to be sorry for, ok? This isn't your fault, and you're so good with me when I'm freaking out, this is the least I can do for you. I wish I could help you more, take it all away. Please, baby, don't ever think I don't want to help you or that I mind at all, okay? I love you so much, and I want you to feel better." He tells you.
"Can you please just hold me?" You say so quietly he almost can't hear you, but he does.
"Of course my love"
He guides you into his arms, leaning to recline back and rotating you slightly so your ear was pressed to his heart, and wrapped his strong arms around your frame.
Your body is still shaky, and your back and neck are sticky, still covered in sweat, but he doesn't care. All he cares about now is helping you feel ok again.
"I'm here, baby. I got you, ok?" He whispers. "Whatever happened in your dream, it wasn't real. I'm here, and you're here with me."
You're exhausted, and hearing his voice and the beating of his heart is pushing you closer and closer to sleep. Brendon must sense this, because he presses a final kiss to the top of your head, and whispers to you again, quieter this time.
"It's ok honey, you can rest. I'll hold onto you. If you wake up again, I'll be right here. Always. I love you, Y/N."
That was the last thing you heard before you finally drifted back into a much more peaceful sleep, and you didn't wake again until the morning.