Some Secrets Should Stay Secrets (Supernatural)

My Heaven On Earth

._.__.~Felicity~.__._.

We spent a few hours partying until I was pretty sure Castiel had drank too much eggnog. Just a little bit.

"What makes you say that?" Sam asked once I had told them.

Before I could answer, Castiel stumbled over to us with his eggnog in his hand and slurred, "I have never, ever enjoyed anything this much. I am truly having fun," He looked over at me. "I think I hear jingle bells!"

We all laughed a little. "You're definitely gonna hear something ringing in the morning." I gave him a pat on the shoulder.

He looked back at Sam and Dean, hunched over the table. "You... are the best friends anyone could have. You're just... you are the best. I... I love you guys. I lo- I love you! The... bestest of friends," I noticed that whenever he said "friend", there was a brief moment of hurt in Dean's eyes. "You're my pals. My... amigos. My buddies. You... you guys... are the bestest of buddies. Hey, does anyone else think the eggnog tastes a bit funny?"

He took another drink of eggnog until I took the mug and set it on the table. "Yeah, we may need to cut you off."

"Hey, let's listen to more music, huh? Let's... let's just throw down!" He used hand gestures for effect. Or he was that wasted, I couldn't be sure.

"Cas," Dean began. "It's almost midnight. We can throw down tomorrow."

"Pffft! No way! Sleep is... for the weaks. And we... we... are... s-strongs." He hiccuped.

"Whatever, you lightweight." Dean muttered.

"We... we haven't even made cookies yet!"

I sighed. "We did. You ate them all."

He chuckled. "Oh yeah."

I couldn't help but smile. I leaned in and whispered in his ear, "Wanna help me bake some special cookies?"

He looked at me and gasped with delight. I put my finger to my lips, gesturing for him to stay quiet. He took a quick glance over at the boys before looking to me and nodding.

Dean sighed. "If you're gonna have sex, there's no need to be so secretive. We know you do that regularly."

Sam slapped him on the shoulder, although he couldn't help but laugh.

"If you boys wanna go to bed, that's fine. We've, um, we've got it from here." I glanced over at Castiel, who was grinning from ear to ear.

They soon went upstairs, and I was alone with my lover.

He could hardly contain his excitement when he asked me, "What kind of cookies? What kind of cookies?"

I laughed at his childlike demeanor. It was really cute. "Trust me, they're special."

He looked around as though he was making sure we were alone. He whispered, "Are they for Santa Claus?"

I contained my laughter as best I could. "Nope, they're all ours. Trust me, if Santa got his mitts on these cookies, flying that sleigh would be a hella lot harder."

We mixed the dough in a big bowl. I added the... special ingredient, and arranged the dough on the pan. We popped them into the oven for about a half hour, or however long it was.

"They smell unlike any other cookie I've ever smelled." Castiel grinned.

The corners of my lips twitched upward, threatening a smile. "Trust me, lover, they'll taste different, too."

I ate one or two, and I definitely felt a bit of a buzz. Castiel, on the other hand, ate about five or six. Maybe seven.

"Felicity," He giggled. "What was in those cookies?"

I giggled too. "I told you... they're special!"

We were sitting on the floor, our backs against the counter, the pan of cookies at our feet. I had a tub of ice cream, and we were both eating from it.

Castiel had become very interested in his own fingers. "Felicity, my fingers are like snakes!"

We both laughed. I rested my head on his shoulder, closing my eyes. "This is the best. Christmas. Ever."

He let out a long yawn. "I-I'm tired."

I smiled and nuzzled my head into the crook of his neck.

"She was lost in so many different ways,

Out in the darkness with no guide.

I know the cost of a losing hand there,

But for the grace of God, oh I...

I found heaven on earth,

You are my last, my first.

And then I hear this voice inside...

Ave Maria

I've been alone when I'm surrounded by friends.

How could the silence be so loud?

But I still go home knowing that I've got you,

There's only us when the lights go down.

You are my heaven on earth,

You are my hunger, my thirst.

I always hear this voice inside...

Singing Ave Maria.

Sometimes love can come and pass you by,

While you're busy making plans.

Suddenly hits you, and then you realize,

It's out of your hands...

Baby, you've got to understand,

You are my heaven on earth,

You are my last, my first.

And then I hear this voice inside...

Ave Maria,

Ave Maria,

Ave Maria."

"F-Felicity?" Castiel mumbled once I finished singing.

I looked up at him. "Yeah?"

He seemed to be barely capable of keeping his eyes open. "I... I l- I lo...-" Before he could say what he was trying to say, he finally passed out.

I smiled tiredly and cuddled closer to him, setting the ice cream aside. I wrapped my arms around him and closed my eyes. Just before I fell asleep, I whispered, "You don't have to say it; I know you do."