In our language (TreeBros)

2

A/N Kinda long, brace yoselfs.

    

      My First 2 classes  went by uneventful, like they always do.  I almost entirely managed to force all thoughts of Connor out from my mind. I found myself determined not to get distracted just because something unusual had made an appearance  in my life. It'd be idiotic to think everything would go on as it always had, that's just not how the world works.

 Was I prepared to accept that things are unpredictable in the real world? no. Was I loosing the control that I'm just now realizing was only ever an illusion created by the feeling of consistency ? definitely. Would I let that consume me? probably not.

   Dr.Sherman says I need to be more sure of things, which is strange because I'm sure of lots of things. Being indecisive doesn't make me unsure of absolutely everything. I have confidence in the fact that I'm really problematic, that counts as being sure of something. Right?

     I was now back to thinking on a more normal level, or at least normal for me, Gosh knows normal for others can be...unique. I learned that the hard way, which I've tried to forget about, preferring to bury that memory deep in my memories. Very deep. I won't revisit the trauma of that night, let's just say that Jared gets incredibly open when he has bath bombs in his system.

    I don't think I'll ever look at him the same.

I can feel myself shudder just imagining it, I didn't know a human being could fit so many bath bombs into their mouth, honestly, I wish I never had to find out. 

    I was focused on the people around me, my classwork, every possible thing that could go wrong and unsettling things about Jared. For the first two classes of the day I was fine. I assumed I'd stay that way, like every other day. Unfortunately, as I should've known at this point, today was NOT like every other day. 

   I guess the world decided to be cruel and pull a cliche movie plot twist that I wasn't ready for. I feel like I should have been ready for this. Imagine the shock that hit me when I walked in-to literacy and saw Connor Murphy of all people sitting in my classroom. This time my body wasn't on my side, including my legs, which I now felt a great sense of betrayal towards. Seriously, I thought we were friends?  

  Hesitation had overwhelmed me and I froze in place.  I stood with my eyes glued to the boy whos head was planted on the desk he was sitting at , in what seemed like a very uncomfortable position in my opinion. He wore a dark hoodie and a pair of slightly lighter skinny jeans, along with black boots that reached just past his ankles. His hair was messy and slightly greasy but somehow it worked for him. I couldn't help but wonder what it would look like if he'd brushed it-

  So, after all of my efforts to finally forget about him, here I am, starring at this boy who doesn't even know I exist with such fascination. Really, I can't help it, I guess I've always been more aware of him than others, but that's only natural when he scares the living heck out of me.

    I'm still starring when I finally realize-

Oh Shoot- He's looking at me.

Forcing myself to look away at something else, anything else, was one of the hardest things I did all day. I stumble to reach my desk. I sat down silently but not before I heard a scoff muttered out in my direction. 

"The f*ck you starring at?, huh Blondie?"

My throat went dry and my heart nearly stopped. If you ask me I'm more of a dirty blonde than a proper blonde so I don't fit the requirements to be called 'blondie' but I'm more focused on other issues at the moment.