Josh Dun x Reader

Fever Dream High

Warnings: Friends with benefits relationship, some touchy feely stuff (no smut), angst

Word Count: 1745

Summary: You try to keep your true feelings about Josh hidden for the sake of not ruining your relationship, but it's not as easy as you once thought.

Author's Note: It feels kind of weird to be back to posting one shots in the middle of the week, but I'm also very happy to be writing requests (speaking of which, they're open!) Also as you can probably tell from the title, this fic is loosely based on Cruel Summer by Taylor Swift. I hope you like this one :)

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 The air was sticky in Josh's living room, despite the breeze that came in through the porch door that he had left wide open. The cool air brushed along your bare shoulders, a stark contrast to the warmth of Josh's hands on your lower back. Your fingers were tangled in his hair as he peppered kisses along your neck, moving towards your collarbone.

It's nothing serious, right?

You tilted Josh's head back up so that you could capture his mouth with yours, needing the connection. His hands pressed on your back, bringing you even closer to him. Your hands started to move from his hair down along his shoulders, barely ghosting over his skin.

Come on, Y/N, you aren't jealous, are you?

You kissed him harder, hoping it would shut your brain up. Josh wound an arm around your waist and shifted so that you were now beneath him, totally surrounded by his arms. His body. Him. He started to kiss along your jaw again, though this time you let him. This was what you needed: to get totally lost in him.

Rule number one: no catching feelings.

"Josh, stop," you gasped, suddenly pushing at his chest. "Please."

Josh pulled away immediately, "Ok, ok. I'm sorry."

He leaned down and grabbed your shirt from where it had been discarded on the floor earlier in the night, passing it to you. You practically snatched it out of his hand and pulled it on over your head.

"It's not you," you shook your head, sincerely wanting him to know that he hadn't done anything wrong. "I'm just... I can't."

"Are you ok?"

"I'm sorry," you said, as if it mattered. "I thought I could do this tonight, but I can't."

"Is something going on? Do you want to talk about it?"

"I think I just need a minute. I'll be right back."

You got off the couch without taking another glance at Josh. Your body was shaking from all the adrenaline, both from what had been happening and the thoughts racing through your head. Once you had a moment to settle that down, you could decide what to do from here.

As soon as you were in the safety of the bathroom, you leaned against the door and closed your eyes. Your chest was heaving, not helped by the warm air that surrounded you. It took a second for your breathing to finally regulate and drop back to a normal pace, but it was enough to release some of the tension in your body.

You could hear Josh walking around in the living room, probably opening up more windows so that the house would finally cool down. It hadn't been a matter that was on either of your minds a few minutes ago, but now...

"Stop," you muttered, shutting your eyes tight. "Not your problem."

You finally stepped away from the door, instead moving to stand in front of the sink. The water that came from the tap was near freezing, which was exactly what you needed right now. Your fingers curled as you stuck them under the stream of water, but you kept them there until your palms filled with water. The splash of cool water against your face was just what you needed to get rid of the heat.