To die with you *wroetoshaw* ✔

41

 2 months later

I was sat on a swing in my garden contemplating my life right now and the decisions I had to make. What Harry and I had just learnt could change everything for the best short term but the worst long term, and it was all up to me.

5 hours earlier  

'so we need to talk' Harry wandered into the kitchen hugging me from behind, he lightly kissed my neck. I turned so that he was now holding my waist as I leaned against the side. 'whats up' I beamed at him. I knew as soon as he asked that whatever it was he was nervous he had that kind of stance I could recognise it from a mile off. 'I want to have a baby and I know it could be a mistake so I was wondering if we could talk about it if your not down then forget it I just wanted to ask?' I stroked his face 'I've got a doctors appointment today and of course I want a baby haz I want a child with you endlessly I just need to find out if my body can take it' I felt his grip and body relax. 'And may I come with you' I rolled my eyes 'you're my husband you don't have to ask' we both smirked at how the word rolled off my tongue.

Just as Harry was waiting for me in the car I gave Jide a call and explained it all; 'please y/n if they say there is any danger you can't!' I huffed through the phone and grabbed my handbag 'I'll let you know' we both said love you and hung up. I ran to the car and Harry started up the engine driving quickly there as we didn't want to be late. We were sat waiting and I was holding Harry's hand as tightly as possible, I always hated my checkups they made me nervous and uncomfortable. 'y/n Lewis' we both looked up. I inhaled a long deep breath and followed them in.   

I sat in the chair holding Harry's hand tighter and tighter the more they tested the usual, breathing rate, heartbeat, blood it was all quite overwhelming. 'right so everything seems good right now and there is no complications which is good possibly meaning if it stays like this you have a longer life span' he beamed at me 'questions?' I got up all my courage and caressed Harry's hand rubbing circles with my thumb. 'We've been thinking and would it be possible for us to conceive?' he took in a sharp breath. 'y/n are you aware the effects this -' I cut him off  'I understand but I want this badly' he flicked through some more notes 'y/n it could shorten your time and it must be now as the deadline is coming closer if you are sure but effects could be fatal like possibly' he paused for a moment and we both knew what was coming. 'death' those words rung in my ears but I tried to block them out for a second. 'ok I will email you our final decision' he saw us out of the room.

The car journey home was silent neither of us said a word until we got to the front door. 'y/n listen we're not having a child I'm not putting you in that kind of risk' I grabbed the sides of his face. 'no Harry this is my choice and I will let you know when I have decided' we walked in and Harry instantly sat down holding his head in his hands I walked past him straight into the garden. I sat on my swing trying to think of a solution. All I want is for Harry to be happy at my expense or not. I wanted a child so bad but I knew how much harm it could bring to a child to grow up without parents although again my child would always have Harry as a father and the boys would bring her up in the most amazing environment. I cried a little bit trying to get it out but at the end of half an hour I already knew what I wanted I knew what I had wanted this whole time I was just avoiding it.

[A/N] so I will try update again today, also does anyone watch elite on netflix cause I've been watching it all day and I love it lol please vote and thanku x