WHEN IT ENDS || Jason McCann Fictional Story||

~|My Present|~

"You realize how much you truly miss someone when something happens, good or bad, and the only person you want to tell is the one person who isn't there„

-§∞•∞•∞•†•∞•∞•∞§-

Have you ever thought that life could throw you so many different kinds of feelings while you can barely deal with the emotions that a human being is bound to have?

Did you suddenly think of cursing everything and everyone around you one day when your whole life you have despised the thought of using foul language?

I thought that just like every normal kid I would get to grow up with an open-minded family who could understand me, study hard, graduate, get a job, marry someone whom I could love with all my heart, have children and grow old together , reminisce all the memories that we would make in our marital life.

Was that too much to ask?

How did my life get so. . .
upside-down?

Oh, wait.

Because of me

It is all my fault that I am the way that I am today. I used to blame my parents before because I thought that they never loved me and that I was their adopted child.

I got that idea back then because I used to watch this television series where a girl thought she was adopted and in reality she was living with her actual mother.

Kids.
So naïve.
But I was never so.

I was a spoiled brat even before I knew what that meant. For the heck of it.

Looking back to my losses, so far I have lost my maternal grandparents. My friends. My relationship with my family. My ability to talk with people and socialize. My school. My teachers. The person whom I thought I loved for real for the first time. My sanity.

Hmm.

Now that I have made an itinerary, I cannot help but think about the losses and how much I missed out with them.

My maternal grandparents are two figures whom I do not recall much about. But my limited time with them tells me that they loved me. More than my paternal grandparents.

My gramma was someone who took care of me when I did not have my mother with me. As a child, the mother happens to be a compulsory figure, even for me. So considering that I had always cried in my mother's absence, even with my father around me, my gramma was the one who could manage a critter like me.

But she had to leave.

Because some lunatic called 'Cancer' was draining her life.

When she died, I could not tell what it was that I was feeling. I watched her, sleeping but not breathing. My mother slid my palms over her face, that I remember. I can paint a fresh picture of her right now with all kinds of emotions written on her beautiful face. Her smile, her ridiculously long hair, her affection.