Lazy and I know !

Bitches and .....Tragedy !!!????

Chapter  4: Bitches and .....Tragedy !!!????
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Every morning when I come to school,  most of my friends are already there . You know,  with my bus moving with the speed of a limping snail  .    . Well that's another topic for another day but you know what pisses me the most from the very first period? ??

Yes,  the crap these bitches talk . Okay,  as I cannot and will not take the actual names due to privacy reasons,  here are the code words me and Zubina made :

Miss  Black

Miss Light Brown

And Puff !!!!!

So this is how it goes, 

Light Brown enters the class and sits on her assigned seat . Being far from Black,  she starts shouting  . And it's like this :

" Hey Black,  you know what GAGA BUGA BUGA BOOOO GUGAGOOI LALAPO BALA BALA LEEEEEEE........ !!!! "

And with that the non stop torture begins  .

Black : "Yeah that was sooooo LALAPO POOOPA POOO POOOPA BANA BARRY BARRY PHOO . JUSTIN BEIBER IS SOO HOT . OMG !!!!! I heard BLA BLA BLA BLA and even more BLA BLA BLA !!!!! "

And then they start shouting a lot more pure,  unadulterated bullshit which is totally beyond my comprehension .

Many of you will say,

  " But Shipra,  don't you think you're being discriminating . Afterall even you talk shit sometimes ."

^^^^^ I know I do and everyone does . But I don't know why it annoys me .

My rational mind tells me :

"Relax Shipra they're not THAT bad ! You're just exaggerating ...... "

But the voice inside me shouts at the top of its lungs ," Go Shipra,  what are you waiting for !!!! Smack that head with the pea - sized brain of hers with the wooden chair in front of you !!!! " [SFX  : Cheerful music in the background ]

Now some of you will say,  " Oh Puh - lease Shipra,  I didn't find anything wrong about then,  like,  they're like,  you know,  like the normal girl because,  like --- "

^^^^^ Shut up !  Speaking time over .......  It happens because I have this natural liking and natural high- disliking against people . Even you must have it . Right?  NO ?   Then you're too much of a rainbows and unicorns kind of person (Though there's nothing wrong in being one ) , I'm not ! That how my mechanism is .

But Light Brown and Black are still in the range of my tolerance most of the time . In fact,  Black is a really likeable person when she's not with Light Brown or some other bitch . But the Queen Bitch is still left .

Yup,  that right .

Puff !!!

Calling her utterly dumb,  would be the understatement of the century .

She is someone who thinks that three times two equals monkey and cancer can be treated with hugs and kisses . And when I say this I'm not even kidding .

I hate such people with an I Q of a negative pumpkin . I mean seriously,  you think being THAT dumb is cute ?  If yes . Then let me tell you,  It's Not !!! 

Then again , " Shipra,  you are being mean hearted against the people who haven't been blessed with as much brains as you do " , one of them will say .

^^^ Grow up . If she would have been the victim of some serious mental disease I should have been sympathetic . But no such thing like that . And please . I beg . Stop saying shit like God blessing people with brains and all . She just  doesn't utilize it . Why ?  She is too busy fixing her hair all day....

There was a point of time when I used to think there was a 3-set way too be so absurd minded . I bet there's an advertise like this

+++++++++++++++++++++
Long  gone are the days 
when you had to work    
very hard to become the
ultimate dumb ass . Now
you can do it with only 3 
simple steps just in           
$1, 999, 999 . How?  Read below .                               
Step 1 : Order our         
magic potion which       
contains precious ingredients like frog's eye and camel's milk .

Step 2 : Buy a red velvet carpet

Step 3 : Spill the contents of the vial on the red carpet and shout "Give me RED !!!"

And Boom !!!! You suddenly turn into an A Grade idiot !!!

Introductory offer : Red carpet absolutely free !!! *

*Offer valid till stocks last

+++++++++++++++++++++++

I don't think after this I need to tell to more about the bitches .

So hear this :

On this Friday something very tragic happened with me . It was the second period . The maths class was going on and I was chatting with my friends while doing the sums with occasional threats from the teacher . Enter : Red House Captain and a Prefect (Prefects are actually some monitor kind of people and a few are selected from each house every year . The prefect batch is always from the ninth standard but as my life sucks they decided to make only 10 Prefects from the whole of 9th from each house this year and kept back the tenth graders . And of course I didn't become one . Why ???? Trust me even I don't know why . But now I'm extremely happy I didn't become one because they need to do every possible volunteering shit . So Yay Life !!! Not everything that happens is bad )

Coming back to the tragedy . The red house captain announced : Students who want to take part in the March Past for the annual sports day can give their names  . Prefects are compulsory .

Of course no one gave their names .With that I thought he would happily put Aditya's name and go away . But no . He said : And Shipra just come out once .

So I went thinking it was something regarding the Elocution that I'd taken part in . Then he told me : "I've already given your name for the March past . " As if it was my dream to do so . "But I'm not a Prefect. Those assholes didn't make me one . Why do I have to take part . " , I protested .

"Because I don't want all the stupid and  fat people to join . And you can just come for a few days bunking  your classes and then quit . It'll become very easy for you to skip any boring classes "

I know .... who made him the house captain  you're wondering . This time I know the answer . The same stupid teacher who didn't make me a prefect .

After a little more of argument I realised it was hopeless . So I said , " Adityas is a prefect . Take his name . "

But Aditya being Aditya didn't give his name . I don't understand why kids are so stubborn these days.......

Though they said I could back out after a few days after  , I doubt they'd let me . Yeah, I'd had a similar experience .....

Anyways,  afterwards I tried to covince Zubina  , who is also a prefect,   to take part in the March Past . But again,  I don't think a crazy  dog bit her that she'd agree !!!!!

But I'm so thankful there's Mr. Blue for company . He's another crazy and fun loving guy . I'll write about him some other day maybe . But even he's a good friend . We don't talk that much in the class but a lot in the bus . But Annual sports day is on 21 st December which is his birthday !!!!! Yeah the day it was said the world would be destroyed in 2012. But as the world might not end on  21st December 2014, I need to think of some way to get out of this Stupid March Past  *fingers crossed *

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Vote and comment of you're lazy and you know !!!!

Posted on : 6 December' 14