Highest Bidder

Chapter 5: Who Really Wins?

I look at her as she closes the door. Her whole face drops and pales as she realizes it's me. I scan her. All of her. I shake my head and sit in an armchair, crossing my right leg over my left. She doesn't move for a few minutes. She just stares at me. Shocked. Slowly walking over, she sits in the armchair next to me and looks so confused.

"I...I don't understand." She's meek and mild- totally opposite from her performance on stage. It wowed me. Stunned me to the core. Not only in her fierceness, but just her. The way she acted. The show she put on. Massively attention seeking. Scandalous....sexy. I hate to admit I was just as sucked in as the rest of the men in that room. I was enamored and lusting for her. Then again...when don't I lust for Helen Sharpe.

"It's very simple. You told me to do something and I did." She shakes her head.

"Max. That was...why?" She's fighting with herself. I know. She's torn between her anger and shock.

"Because the thought of you...- huh- I did what I had too." Her eyes seem watery and I know she's still conflicted. I stand up and reach in my jacket. Taking out the certificate of payment, I hand it to her and go to leave. "Have a good night."

I open the door and head down the hallway. I'm disappointed- in myself. I put her in that position of selling her body and making a show out of herself. A million dollars wasn't nearly enough to apologize for what I did. And no amount of money in the world could ever afford Helen. I walk to the elevator and get inside. My chest feels heavy with guilt. I can't take back what happened. I can't change how I felt seeing her tonight. I've never been so attracted to anyone before. Not even Georgia- which is horrible to say, but it's true. I had always been curious about Helen and my afflictions for her. I thought it was just a passing infatuation, but the more I work with her and the more we communicate- I find her utterly irresistible and that's dangerous, especially now that I know there's a physical attraction there as well as personal. I want her in more ways than one.

I'm just as terrible as all the men in that room tonight.

What's worse is it's not even solely because I enjoyed watching her. No. It was my jealousy raging inside of me. The thought of any other man going out with her drove me mad. I was willing to throw everything at her. My phone goes off and it's Reynolds.

"Hey man. How'd it go?" He asks and I sigh as I exit the elevator to the atrium.

"Good. Really good."

"Did you get her?"

"Yeah." I want to sound more excited for my victory, but I can't.

"So what's the matter?"

"I spent a million on her. And it's not that she's not worth that. She's worth more than money can afford- but, I think it made everything worse. She could barely say anything to me when I gave the ticket over. She just asked me why and I...I couldn't find the words to tell her how I feel." I hear him sigh.

"Well, it'll come to you."

"How many months do I have to pay off the loan to your friend?"

"You don't have too."

"Floyd. A million dollars is a lot of money! I can't go without paying that back."

"Max, my friend told me to tell you that it's free of charge when it comes to matters of the heart. It's not like you blew it on a new car or penthouse. It was for the woman you care most about. The woman you love." My heart sinks. Love? "Listen, I know you're still coming around after everything that happened...but don't let Helen slip away."

"Thanks Floyd. This whole thing means a lot to me."

"I know, man. Just keep your head up and go for it." He hangs up and I exit the Dam. I slowly make my way home and the night sky above me is filled with stars. I could have easily told Helen I love her. I could have so easily pressed her against that door and kissed her until our lips were sore. What good would that have done? It wouldn't have satiated my want for her- my need. It wouldn't have been reciprocated very well either. She doesn't feel those kind of emotions for me. She sees me as her friend and colleague. If Helen Sharpe ever felt anything for someone she would tell them. She's so honest. To a fault almost. If she loved me- she would have told me a long time ago- married or not. She doesn't hold onto intangible dreams or have them for that matter. She's goal oriented. She's confident in what she wants and makes sure she gets it. She's a fierce little brat and that's  one of the millions of reasons I love her. I love that she challenges my authority. She plays risky games to see how much she can get away with. Yet she's an honorable and proud lady. She needs no one. Wants nothing and yet deserves everything.