Soft and Gay - Cadnis Oneshots

I messed up...

So.. Hi here's my first fanfiction ever. Hope you enjoy.

Cady was lying in bed staring at the ceiling. Tears slowly running down her cheeks. It's been a few weeks since the incident at Cadys houseparty, and those two weeks have been hell on earth. It's the longest time Cady and Janis didn't talk to each other. And Cady missed it.

She missed messing around at lunch, cuddling up during one of their many movie nights, her eyes which look like a pool of chocolate and most of all her smile. The smile which makes her day so much brighter even if she just sees it from a far. All of that now gone, and the fact that she was head over heels in love with Janis didn't make it any easier.

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Janis sat on her couch watching a horror movie with Damian. It just felt off. It wasn't the same without a terrified Cady cuddling up into Janis side. She missed combing through Cadys silky hair, twisting little strands around her index finger. The little sighs of pleasure Cady let out, her laugh, she just missed Cady.

She didn't even pay much attention to the movie anymore. She just replayed the scenario of Cadys house party in her head over and over again, getting frustrated and sad because she knew that all of this could've been different if she would've stopped pushing Cady into pretending to be someone she actually is not. But it also hurt seeing your friend slowly drift away. It hurt when Cady accused her of being in love with her. Especially because it was true.

She didn't know when she started crying but she was glad that Damian was just there, holding her for as long as she needed to be held.

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It's lunchtime at Northshore High Cady stepped into the cafeteria with her lunchbag in her hand greeted by almost everyone with a friendly smile. Something which never really happened before. But she didn't care. She just went straight to her table where she could be by herself drowning in her thoughts about the only two true friends she ever had. Everything went okay until their eyes meet. And she saw it again. The hurt in her beautiful brown eyes. She just wanted to run up to her and hug her. But she knew she couldn't.

So she went on thinking of the best way how she could fix this mess. She had to fix it. She lost her home and friends in Kenya. She couldn't lose Janis and Damian too. But especially Janis.

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It was fifth period. Janis sat alone in the art room beside an empty canvas staring off into space. Her head was empty, she didn't get anything on the canvas today. She just sat there with her head down, thinking about how normally Cady would sit beside her asking her hundreds of questions, distracting her from the work she should be doing. It was her favorite part about the free period. simply being with Cady. "The little us time" as she always said it. Janis smiled weakly at that thought until there was a little knock on the door.

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Cady hesitantly reached for the door handle and opened it slowly, revealing a startled Janis sitting beside an empty canvas. Cady couldn't move. She played this scenario out in her head at least a thousand times, but now nothing comes out except of a little "hey" which was hardly above a whisper.

"Hey" Janis echoes. Not really knowing what else to do.

"Can we please talk?"

Janis desperately wanted to say no and just run away or maybe just scream out everything what she was feeling at that moment but the sound of Cadys soft voice and the hurt look on her face just kept her from doing exactly that. Instead she pushes out the stool. Her stool. The stool Cady always sat on when they were together and gestures her to sit down with a silent nod.

They sat there for a few minutes in complete silence not knowing how to start until Cady spoke up.

"I messed up.. pretty badly."

"Caddie-"

"No please just.. listen." Cady started. "I know there's nothing to say that would excuse the things I did to you but I promise you that I never meant to hurt you.. I just wanted to fit in.. I wanted to be left alone" Cady paused for a bit, trying to find the right words. "And then I saw how bad Regina treated people who were different and I guess I just wanted to be everyone but me and forgot that I could hurt people in the process. I was just so confused." Janis studied her face carefully. Cady looked kind of lost so she figured it was her turn to speak.

"I'm sorry too Cady. I shouldn't have used you to get revenge on Regina because of something that is originally a thing between me and her. It was stupid. I'm sorry that I brought you into this and I'm sorry that we didn't stop when you wanted to."

After that there was a more comfortable silence between them until Janis spoke up again.

"May I ask why you were confused? Maybe I can help." Janis suggested with a little smile. That smile that always makes Cadys heart melt.

Still the anxiety was rising inside of her again. She knew she had to tell Janis that she likes her eventually, but right now she was just afraid that it wouldd destroy everything she just fixed.

"I guess it just terrified me that I didn't feel nothing close with Aaron, to the things I feel when I was with a certain girl.." Cady paused again. She couldn't bring herself to say that the girl she was talking about was right beside her yet. "And I don't really know how to deal with that."

After Cady was done Janis just pulled her into a bone crushing hug. She knew how hard this kind of realization is. She couldn't help but wonder who Cady was referring to, but that was something for another day.

Cadys heart started skipped a few beats and started to pick up speed. She could practically hear it pumping in her ears. It was too much but still not enough in a way. After a while she pulled away a little just so she could look into her eyes again. Those beautiful, big brown eyes. And without thinking she leaned in, kissing Janis softly.

Janis was shocked in all the best ways, but still shocked. The girl she crushed on since she started at Northshore just kissed her. But before she really got a chance to react Cady abruptly pulls away and starts rambling about how sorry she was until Janis grabbed her face just to kiss her once more, a little bit more passionately. After they pulled away – mostly to catch their breath – Janis pulled Cady into a hug again, and started to stroke her hair .

"I love you". Cady said in a tiny voice, calmed by the soft sensation of Janis fingers combing through her hair.

"I love you too Caddie".

That's a wrap for the first one. I hope you liked it.☺️