Soft and Gay - Cadnis Oneshots

What I've Been Looking For (Reprise)

Well it's a recurring theme.. last one I swear to god. But this was actually the first Idea I had soooo I had to post that too. It got a little depressing but there's also fluff. Enjoy.

Dark thunderclouds piled up over Chicago. It has been raining all week which is an accurate representation of how Cady feels right now. It was that time of the year when she just questioned her whole existence. Everything which makes her happy and everything that has ever happened to her in general. She was lying in bed staring at the ceiling. Those feelings are way too complicated for her to really understand. And on days like this she just wishes to be back in Africa.
How much she misses it. Everything was so easy. She had her animals and was literally living in paradise and now... she was living in a huge city full of smog and people who are just... weird.
On the other hand she met the most beautiful girl she ever laid eyes on and the love of her life Janis. But then again: was it even really love? She had nothing to compare to. Sure no one ever made Cady feel so happy before like Janis does but what if she doesn't really mean what she says? What if Cady's just her little toy? An experiment? What if she isn't good enough for her? Not pretty enough?
Cady felt instantly bad for thinking this. Janis loves her unconditionally and she knows that, but on that day she couldn't help it. She just curled herself up into a ball and listened to the rain. Not caring about the tears which were slowly running down her face.

Janis' concern grew with every passing minute when Cady just won't answer her texts and calls. Normally there's one ring and an enthusiastic Cady greets her on the other line. But now: nothing. After hours of hearing nothing from her beloved girlfriend she decided to go and check up on her. Plus this weather is perfect to just cuddle in bed and watching Netflix with your favourite person.
As she turned into the Herons driveway the first thing she noticed was that the car wasn't there. But there was a little light on in Cadys room. Cady never leaves a light on when she goes out so Janis figured that her parents went out that day. Perfect. She thought to herself. More time to themselves.
As Janis knocked on the door no one answered. Her concern grew even stronger now. But luckily she knew where the spare key is.

Cady heard the door open and she knew exactly who was coming into her house. Janis. As much as she hated the idea of Janis seeing her in the state she was in she really couldn't do something about it now. She just stayed in her position and waited for her girlfriend to come up the stairs.
Eventually she heard a soft voice from the doorway.
„Hey you." Janis said in a low yet enthusiastic voice which would make Cadys heart melt at an instant but today... she just felt empty which made her even sadder when she already was.
„Hey" she whispered not even bothering to turn around and look at her girlfriend.

Janis was scared at this point. What the fuck is going on? Cady never did something like that. No matter how shitty her day was she always turned around and just smiled at her, went in for a hug or gave her a quick kiss.
She was crying she could tell. And it absolutely crushed her heart. But she decided to take it slow. She sat down on the bed leaning against the headboard and just softly started running her fingertips up and down Cadys arm. She always loved that. It calms her.
„You wanna talk about it?" Janis asked trying to hide her concern as much as she possibly can.
„I don't think that you'll like it" that statement just terrified Janis. Did she do something wrong? What was the big deal?
„I still wanna hear it though. Maybe I can help."
Cady simply just turned over and showed Janis what a wreck she was by now.
„You still wanna hear it?" she asked. Her voice was shaking.
Janis simply just held out her arms pulling Cady gently into her lap. Cady instantly buried her face into the crook of Janis' neck letting out a muffled sob.
Janis was just holding her, rocking her gently planting little kisses on the top of her head and whispering sweet nothings to her trying to calm her down a little. The sobs eventually stop and Cadys breathing got back to normal. Janis pulled away a little wiping the tears off Cadys face gently planting a kiss on her forehead.
„What's wrong Peanut?" Cady had to smile a little. Peanut. It was Janis' special nickname for Cady referring to how small she really was compared to her.
„It's just all too much right now... I'm really home sick. Sometimes I get the feeling that I lost my home by leaving Africa and sure if I've never left I would've never met you and you're the best thing that has ever happened to me by far but then.." Cady paused. She was right Janis didn't really like what she was hearing because she knew how much it was messing with Cadys head. But she patiently waited until Cady started speaking again. „I'm just really scared of loosing you too... Of not being good enough."
Janis started hugging her again thinking about what she should say first. That Cady is the most beautiful human being on this earth or the fact that she'll never lose Janis because she simply couldn't live without her. She couldn't decide and did the next best thing she could think of: singing their song. The song which kinda brought them together. Which made it even more special to Janis than it already was before. Cady always loves when Janis sings to her so it was worth a try.

It's hard to believe
That I couldn't see
You were always there beside me
Right after the first lines Janis noticed Cady getting more comfortable and she started stroking Cadys beautiful red hair.
Thought I was alone
With no one to hold
But you were always right beside me
This feeling's like no other
I want you to know
I've never had someone that knows me like you do
The way you do
I've never had someone as good for me as you
Cady started singing the harmony quietly smiling a little.
No one like you
So lonely before I finally found
What I've been looking for
As they sang the last note Janis tightens her grip saying:
„You'll never lose me Caddie. You'll always be my little Peanut. I'll be by your side until you take your last breath and whatever comes after that. You are my exact perfect person and I'm falling more and more in love with you every single day... I wouldn't trade that for anything else. Because I simply cannot live without you. I love you. So much it actually hurts."
Janis put a finger under Cadys chin making her look up and connecting their lips into a long slow and soft kiss. And as always for a little moment time stood still and all of Cadys bad thoughts flew out of the window.
They eventually break apart and Cady went into her old position with her head on Janis chest asking:
„Never leave me?"
„Never" Janis answered planting another kiss on the top of Cadys head stroking her hair.
„I love you"
„I love you too Peanut."

Before every fangirl comes at me yes. I saw "Peanut" in a fanfic once but I simply can't remember which fanfic it was and I can't find it.. I'm so sorry.
Anyway as always have a nice day. Bye☺️