Encounters

5. Bedroom

I gazed out of the window, the sun now beginning to drown into the horizon. Days were becoming longer, the nights shorter and the distance between Forest and I further. I sat on the floor with my head resting on the side of his bed as his position reflected mine on the other side. This was coming, I knew it was coming, yet, it hurt. 

"Did you grow to like me then?" he asked. I heard the bed sheet crinkle with the turn of his head, as if he was trying to look at me but he wasn't. He wasn't looking at me, at the way small crescents were beginning to form on my palm. 

"No," I replied honestly, "Not like that. Sadly, Greyson still holds that position." I laughed bitterly. "But I do like you as a friend." The bed sheet crinkled on my side. I was looking but not looking. 

"We're still friends though, aren't we?" Yes, we are. We have to be. I need us to be. But was that selfish of me? Was that unfair to Violet, if we continued to still hang out even though we slept together? That would be weird for her, and I don't want to get in the way of their relationship, not when they like each other so much. I don't want to taint their relationship. 

"Fern." 

He was right in front me, staring fiercely into my eyes. I glanced to his lips. He followed my eyes. How easy it would be just to bridge the gap between us and pretend the world didn't exist and that our hearts didn't belong to other people. How selfish that would be.

"I don't think we should be friends." The words hung in the air, absorbing slowly first into the hurt in his eyes then the anger in his face. He stood up with his sharp glare looking down on me. 

"Listen to me, Fern, if you think that I will believe that you actually don't want us to be friends for one second, you must be thinking I'm the biggest clown around. We may not have been friends for that long but I have not heard you cry over distancing yourself from Blue and Grey just so you don't feel guilty about your feelings, just to let the same thing happen to us! I know I will have to tell Violet about us, and guess what, if she has a problem with it then the point of a relationship is to work through those problems if we genuinely care about each other. And that's not just romantic relationships, that's friendships too! So, tell me, Fern, do you care about me at all!" He breathed angrily through his nose for a few seconds until he dropped down to my level again. He must have noticed how my eyes didn't have the courage to meet his and he closed his own eyes with a sigh. Leaning his forehead against mine, he spoke softly this time, "Fern, are we still friends?"

And I nodded, taking his head along with mine own for the journey and we both laughed at the uncomfortableness of our position. 

"I'm sorry," I whispered, looking up at his closed eyes. Slowly, they opened too. 

"I know," he smiled, "How about you make it up by doing the rest of the project by yourself?"

I laughed, knocking him off me. Getting up, I extended my hand to him. "How about we do this together?" 

He rolled his eyes but grabbed my hand. "Loser."

And we continued working until I needed to leave. And when I left, I left with a goodbye.