It Began With a Smirk

46: The Inner Workings

--Kale’s POV--

I stood in the hall looking at the closed door to Rein’s room. Just go in and strike up a conversation.

As easy as it sounded I couldn’t get the nerves to do it. Maybe she’s not there. Though I knew she was. I stepped up to her door and hesitated with my hand on the doorknob. Just go in.

But again, I couldn’t. We hadn’t talked since the little fight I’d started. More like she’d been avoiding me. I sighed and released the doorknob. I didn’t really know why I’d gone and said all those things to her. Or rather, I did. But I didn’t feel a need to apologize.

She started it. I told myself as I trudged down the hall and into my own room. I slammed the door behind me. Just in case she did decide to come talk to me. I knew she wouldn’t. Part of me wasn’t sure if I wanted to talk to her either.

She had pissed me off so badly. It’s her fault. I told myself.

It was Rein’s fault. She’d gone and messed with my head. I’d only kissed her because I had to. Something in her eyes was so sad, so alone. I had to protect it as much as I had to own it. I’d leaned in and just kissed her. Talking hadn’t worked with her, maybe showing her that I could have some softness in me would?

I’d thought it had gone fine. I’d expected her to pull away right away. Looking back she couldn’t really had since I’d had her against a locker but at the time my mind hadn’t considered that. Soft and surprised her lips had actually felt right beneath mine. I’d never given a kiss just to kiss someone before. There’d always been a reason. But there I was kissing Rein out of the blue and on my own free will.

And then the idiot Grass had ruined it all. I groaned and laid across my bed. The moment she saw him she ditched me and just left. No word. No look to me. No ‘I’ll be right back.’ Just left me standing there. I’d felt like such an idiot.

I wasn’t sure what made me more upset. The fact that she had just run off or the fact that I’d felt something in that second our lips had touched.

What is wrong with me? I wondered and rolled onto my side to stare at the wall. It was barely considered a kiss. Our lips had touched and that was it. She hadn’t even kissed back.

Putting aside my anger about the fact she’d left me for that stupid hick of all people I decided I’d just talk to her about it. I’d let her know it was a mistake. It obviously had been. I’m Kale. I don’t just kiss a girl for no reason. Then she’d pulled up in Skylar’s sleek car. Fucking Skylar.

 

Why did it have to be him? Even Jakeson would have been better. At least with him I had an excuse to intervene. But with Skylar I was powerless. That idiotic good for nothing player. Why would Rein bother with him? He had a worse reputation than I did. He didn’t date. Ever. I was at least thoughtful enough to title my favorites as ‘girlfriend’ for a week or so.

She can do whatever the fuck she wants. I thought sourly. So we’d fought. I’d let my anger get the best of me but she’d had it coming. Part of me knew this wasn’t true but that part was very small and not willing to voice this opinion.

To be honest I’d expected she’d cave by now. It had to be lonely for her. I never saw her at lunch. I only saw her before and after school when Skylar was following beside her. He’d taken to giving her rides without a second thought. Why would he after all? Of course he’d want to get any time to spend with her that he could. Fuck Skylar. I thought again as I rolled back onto my back.

This wasn’t about Rein. I just didn’t want him to win. I didn’t care if I had to play dirty. One way or another I’d get her before he did.

Though I convinced myself this was the reason for my boiling anger I knew it wasn’t. I knew it all went back to Rein and that one sided kiss.

 Anyone But Him - Mr. Hudson