It Began With a Smirk

68: Terrible in the Terrific

The movie dragged on as I curled up against Jakeson on the couch. His arm was around me, holding me close as we cuddled underneath the blanket. Against me he felt so warm and protective I found myself ignoring the movie and listening to his heart beating in his chest.

Even with all the little moments we were able to get with each other just like this I couldn’t help but feel warm every time I was in his arms. Kale had taken to going through so many girls that more often than not I had the house completely to myself.

Just when I’d been feeling lonely as I sketched in my drawing pad Jakeson had called. So I’d invited him over. That’s what normal people did right? Invite their boyfriend of three weeks over to watch a movie? Boyfriend. The word still made me smile. I’d never realized how much I had wanted one until I had one. Now as I shared in his warmth under the blanket I couldn’t picture how I’d ever survived without him.

He was so gentle with me. It was like I was the most precious thing to him. The way he’d smile down at after cupping my chin in his hand to kiss made my stomach erupt in butterflies. I only thought I liked Kale because I was lonely.

Before I knew it I found myself drifting to sleep beside him completely calm and at peace with the world. For once in my life I was actually happy. I had someone who cared about me. I had friends. My mom was getting married. Everything was good.

--Kale’s POV—

 

I shoved my keys into my pockets as I climbed from my car. How long would I be able to keep up what I was doing? How long would I be able to avoid Rein and busy myself with girls? It’s what I wanted. I reminded myself. It had been what I’d wanted.

After waking up on her bed having finally gotten her to open up to me I realized the mistake I’d made. I couldn’t just sleep with her. I was starting to get feelings. Me. Kale. Feelings for my step-sister to be. I couldn’t let that happen. I can’t fall for her when she’s so stubborn she’d never look at me but anything but a pest. And there I was marveling at how her sheets smelled like her as I realized what I was doing. I was starting to like Rein.

She must already be in bed. I noticed as I entered the dark house.

Kristin had been hitting on me for weeks. I’d had a thing with her once before. So it was easy for me to accept her next advance. I’d used her as a substitute for Rein, just like I was doing again now. I was filling myself with embraces and kisses from other girls just so I wouldn’t have to think about her. Why her? I wondered for the millionth time as I trudged up the steps into my room. Why couldn’t it have been anyone else?

But I knew there’d be no good answer. Then she’d gone and started dating Jakeson. I should have seen it coming. But when I saw her kiss him in the hall all I could do was rush off so as not to kill him. What right did he have to her? Why was he all right to kiss back and I wasn’t?

Had she kissed me back? I wondered again as I thought back to the photoroom. In the dark I’d found the guts to finally kiss her. She didn’t pull away.

I shook the thought from my head. It didn’t matter. She was with him now. She kissed him. Not vice versa. He didn’t have to worry about whether she liked him or not. She’d kissed him. She was dating him.

After a long time I gave in to the monster inside and decided to go raid the kitchen for alcohol. Sex hadn’t seemed to dull my annoyed thoughts so maybe some good old alcohol would. I bounded down the stairs and as I walked through the house the sound of t he television on low volume met my ears. She’s still up?

I paused in the hall debating whether I should go talk to her or not. Get it over with. I told myself. She’s going to be related soon enough. Stop being a baby about it.

I sauntered into the livingroom and my eyes fell on the last thing I had ever wanted to see. Jakeson. In my house. On my couch. With Rein sleeping in his arms, her head on his lap as he played gently with her hair. Realizing I’d entered he looked up at me and our eyes met. 

I Don't Love You - My Chemical Romance