J A M M E D

#7 Hate to Stay

It is probably hard to say but I hate staying at home.

At this moment we should be staying at home for security and safety purposes. But I do not like being at home. Not because I like to go out for fun. But because our house doesn't feel like 'home'. We have everything in here but calmness and peace. Everything is noisy and energy-draining. I feel intoxicated being here.

Yes, I'm blessed because I still have my family. But we're no family here. It's more like we're people living in the same house with no care at all. Just doing some household chores to hold everything together.

I really do care about my family. But they're so much to handle ever since. I'm peculiar. I can't handle things like all of them can. I wanted to be alone. I wanted to work things according to my own time.

I'm responsible. I'm efficient. Just don't call me dumb or stupid. I have feelings too. I have patience and respect but they don't last that long. I'd rather stay on the streets than to deal with emotional pain that lasts longer than this pandemic will.