Yours Truly

Part 12: Worthwhile

When I was about to go to bed, I felt something strange, like I was being watched. I asked all of the Villa helpers to take their leave for 2 days so no one's around the Villa, just me and 2 of the Villa's security personnel, but their post were far from the house.

I immediately got my baseball bat, ready to hit whoever it may be. I heard a noise in the living room. I walked cautiously, holding the baseball bat tightly, my heart pounds as I approached the living room, but before I could even hit someone with the bat, a hand reached out to cover my nose with a handkerchief, and before everything went black, I heard the trespassers talking in Korean.

"Ppalli ppalli! Get her in the car!"

Who could this men be?

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I heard a voice of a man waking me up. I was feeling very cold. I could also hear waves crashing on the shore. When I opened my eyes, I was lying down on the sand.

I immediately stood up and ready to fight the man who woke me up, but to my surprise, he was one of the Villa's security personnel.

"Why are you here? Did they also take you?" I asked frantically

"Ma'am, what are you talking about? I'm here because today's my duty in the Villa." he said, a little confused about what I said.

I looked around and I realized that I was still in Villa Catalina.. and I was still holding a bottle of beer.

"There were some guys here earlier. I was.. I was being abducted earlier! How come you do not know!"

"Ma'am, with all due respect, it might be the effect of drinking too much. No one was here earlier, except for you and the Villa helpers. Please go back inside, you'll gonna catch a cold." The security personnel said and went to go on his rounds around the Villa.

"So, it was just a dream? I thought that would be the end of me, whew!" I was still confused but I am relieved that it was just a dream. For a moment there, I laughed at myself, and I've forgotten how lonely this day was.

I went inside the house since it was really cold. I washed myself up and stood behind the glass window, and stare at the beautiful sea. Tears roll down my cheeks when I recalled how Junmyeon back hugged me when I was in the same position a month ago, that was after our reconciliation in the middle of an empty street.

Its still the same, a month after he left, I still cry myself to sleep. But today's the worst, I even slept outside the house and dream of being abducted. Funny how I embody the song "Too much love can kill you". If I continue doing these things, I might really get sick and get myself into trouble with my mom and Mellie. Maybe now's the time for acceptance and moving on.

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4 MONTHS LATER

After that night, I tried my bestest to live my life again. I left Villa Catalina the following day and went back to my unit.

I tried to continue living my life as if nothing happened. As if I was still whole and as if I will still be. I never mentioned anything about what happen to Mellie, but seeing how quiet she is, she might have asked Junmyeon about it.

Everyday is a challenge for me, a challenge to continue moving forward. I am always wearing my pretentious smile outside my unit, but once the sun is down, emptiness starts to creep into my whole being.

Christmas had gone by and I celebrated it with my mom, Uncle John and my half-siblings. They were in the Philippines for a short vacation. I finally accepted Uncle John and I saw how much he loves my mom. He was so caring and I can see that he loves me as well. He even invited me to spend some time with them at their home abroad which I happily accepted.