I revisit memories
As I see myself laughing
How long ago was it?
Long enough for my sister to not be born yet
I return
Watching darkness
In my room all alone
I let two tears fall
And a compressed feeling escapes
In my chest
Full of pain
As it of now or then?
Every day
Revisiting old memories
Tell me
How long ago was it I
Who could no longer sleep
Afraid of yelling
Coming through the door
All about me
Crawling under the bed
Bringing bail polish to use for dolls
I never had dolls
Mom never had money for them
Now I have dozens
She remembers now
After an almost departure
My childish dreams
Just as I wished for love
To speak
A happy family
I let two tears fall
Not getting far
I wipe them away
In utter silence
I still feel my pain
Stop forgetting my birthday
Stop breaking promises
Stop acting like you care
Stop forgetting about me
Gone to the store
Bought everyone something
But forgot all about me
Telling me to go myself
I let two tears drop
Unable to pretend any longer
Everything is not alright
I have no place
Except in a courageous act
Maybe even something dangerous
Trying to feel something
As close as I can get to telling the truth
Yet they say its all lies
No girl could have possibly been that hurt
Tell me are you me?
Are we the exact same?
No
Nor will we ever be
I let two tears fall
Apart from being
Hurt
I laugh seconds later
As my favorite song comes up
On the radio
As I sway smiling
I remember when no one did harm
When peace tilled my world
The moment I saw my bright future
What did I do to deserve this?
After I kept loosing
I saw light
Then darkness
Unable to speak up
I wrote
I let two tears drop
Only two
For the ones who have lost me
The clever being
Evil
Trying to persuade me
To stop living
Yet every year I win
Because I've lived.
