Naam Konda Matrangal

Loyalty & Betrayal

A/N: Long chapter, so enjoy and please please reviews my sweeties! I live for them (i seriously do, i have nothing else to do in quarantine) 

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Kathir's heart shattered at that. Un kannula karunai ye illa.

His body heated up. This wasn't his intention. He didn't think his chides and little bickering with her were meant to cause, this much pain. It wasn't to cause pain at all. He would never admit it, but the quarrels were a mere attempt to make himself, heard and acknowledged. The way she had dismissed their friendship, it didn't break him. But it did irritate him. He had let go of all his likes and dislikes for his family and if he let go of this ... vexation that surged in him every time she disregarded his existence. He was afraid, he... really would fade into extinction. Like a being without a reason, a being without ... anything.

But he never meant to hurt her in doing so. He just wanted to be seen.

"Illa... Mullai, Nee thappa purinjikura ... Nijama verupu illa..." he said in gentle tone, his feet seemed to move on its own accord, inching near her a little.

Mullai couldn't stop the tears, fat droplets oozed out . She couldn't open her mouth, the lump on her throat threatened to create a fresh batch of tears if she did. She merely shook her head at his unconvincing words, eyes on the window sill. She wiped her cheeks, every two seconds, it was bad enough she cried in front of him, he didn't need to see proof of her sadness.

Kathir let his eyes examine her properly without hesitation. The moonlight was enhancing her, eyes, pink and slowly swelling, eyelids puffed up. Tears clumping her eyelashes together, she was fluttering her eyes blinking back new tears. She was wearing a soft chudidhar, something that looked so comfortable to be in. She had a small gash on the left corner of her forehead, and random visible scratches across her arm and elbows, that were forming blue and green markings. Now that he was paying attention to her he realised how delicate she looked. She had always been this delicate, she would bruise easily, he remembered, from their days as partners in heinous crimes such as stealing mangoes. 

He stepped in closer.

"Kovam ohn mella illa... unga kudumbatha pudikathu, unga amma appa- nanga kashtathu la irukum bothu-"

She gave a sarcastic laugh, wiping away her cheeks, turning to face him. Her pupils had dilated, in the dark room with moon being the only source of light. It bore into his own disarming him, he had to blink away to steer clear from her sharp look.

"Yen kathiru.. mama erkumbothu unnaku 10 vayasu, appo yennaku 8 vayasu... antha sandai yen nadathuchu ethuku nadathuchu nammaku appo purinji irukuma? Illa na appa kita udhavi pannunga nu solli irukanuma? Na yenna pannan nu ivlo kovam? Yen appa amma va pudikala na, athu avangaloda vechiko, avanga kita pessatha, na unnaku yenna pannan?" she asked him her tone, demanding.

He looked at his feet, being unable to bear the weight of her gaze. She was right. That fight was between, grown-ups. They didn't even understand the concept of money at that age, how would they have understood betrayal and loyalty? And even if they did understand, why was this her cross to bear? She was as helpless as he was in that age. He shifted uncomfortably. The answer was simple, if she was waiting for one.

It was plain, blind irrational hate.

He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. He would never intentionally be unethical just for the sake of it. Kathir had morals, that he weighed more than his life.

"Thappu than..unna intha perchanai la sethu iruka kudathu. Manichidu." He said, bending down and kneeling to see her eyes.

She looked at him in surprise. She wasn't expecting him to drop his defensive wall this soon. Or at all. She tried to cover up her surprise in seconds still starting at him, waiting for the catch.