Lead Me Out Of The Dark (sequel to Phone Calls)

13 ~ Lost Without You

Title Credit: Blink 182

~

“From my head to my toes!
I’ve made a new me.
And I’ll find a new home!
Somewhere that I belong.”

A string third fret, D string second fret, and I end off the song with a riff like that and a ritardando, strumming G slowly. The small crowd clapped and I smiled. “I’ve got time for one more, any requests?”

“Therapy!”

“Machines.”

“Remembering Sunday!”

“Teenage Dirtbag!”

“Teenage Dirtbag? Hell yes.” I smiled, recalling the song. I did the first few acoustic chords and looked around. “Anyone want to sing with me?”

Several hands, all from girls, shot up. I turned to one girl off to the side and her eyes widened a bit, shuffling out to me. “I-I know all the lyrics.” She squeaked.

“Promise?” I asked, doing the intro still from the recording of the song.

She nodded furiously. Then I started the one-guitar acoustic version and began singing, her along with me.

“Her name is Noel, I have a dream about her…”

~

@MaddieBTK: Sang with this cutie tonight! Wonderful voice, dear! @BurnTheAmanda [twitter picture]

@MaddieBTK: off to the All Time Low show! I’m late!

~

I jogged to the stage just as the guys got off, panting. “Alex! I’m sorry I’m late.”

He brushed me off. “Yeah, whatever.”

“What’s wrong?”

“I told you to be here for the show.” He turned to look at me in the eyes. Usually he’s happy when he get’s off stage. He looks like he’s angry and sad and… hurt.

“I-I’m sorry, more fans came than I thought would, but I’m here now…”

“Yeah, okay, fine.” He turned and walked away.

I looked after him, a bad feeling brewing in my stomach. I messed up. I don’t know how, but I did. Someone tapped my shoulder. It was someone from stage crew.

“Hey uh, I was supposed to give you these on cue but you weren’t here and uh, I don’t know if you still want them or…” He held up a bundle of roses. I took them and thanked him. Oh god, what did I miss?

~

11:30 pm

@AllTimeAddie: @Maddiebtk so apparently you weren't here to see this, it was rlly sweet :( [youtube link]

~

I click the video immediately and sat until I was almost in tears.

“Hey, there’s this girl. I’m in love with this girl. Yeah, that chick right there knows who I’m talking about. Her name is Maddie and we’ve been dating for a long time now, 10 months in a few days. I wanted to say, she’s the light of my life. She makes me so happy, I didn’t think anyone could make me feel this way. That’s why I’m dedicating this song to her, if she wants to come sing it with me she can ‘cause she knows all the lyrics. It’s called ‘I’m Lost Without You’ by Blink 182.”

The song has always brought me to tears. He knows that. Son of a bitch.

“I swear that I can go on forever again.
Please let me know that my one bad day will end.
I will go down as your lover, your friend.
Give me your lips and with one kiss we begin.
Are you afraid of being alone?
Cause I am, I'm lost without you.
Are you afraid of leaving tonight?
Cause I am, I'm lost without you.”

My heart is aching. I wish I could have been there. I should have ran faster, maybe I could have made it. I shouldn’t have stopped at the room, I should have caught a cab, I should have been there.

“Hey, where’s Maddie?” He nervously laughs. Someone runs out and says something into his ear. His face drops. It meant a lot for me to be there. “Oh. Ok. She didn’t make it."

“That sucks bro.” Jack says,

“Lets just go on… this is our last song it’s called Dear Maria Count-” the video ends as the crowd screams. I’m already up and getting my coat on, running out and to the elevator. I get off just as Alex is entering the Hotel, hands stuffed in his pockets and snow covering his shoulders.

“Alex!” I make him look up as I run over. I wrap my arms around him and he stands, surprised. “I’m sorry. If I could go back, I would have been there. I know it meant a lot for me to be there. Thank you so much for singing that song for me.”

He’s hugging me back now. “It’s okay. I’m over it.” He pulls my chin up and smiles at me, kissing me once, making those damn butterflies come back. Then we return to hugging, me sighing in content.

“Maddie.” I hear. I look behind Alex and my eyebrows furrow in confusion, letting go.

“Jess?”

She’s covered in snow, her hair a mess, bags under her eyes, and she’s almost crying. She holds up a piece of mail with my name on it.

I take it from her. “Why are you here? You couldn’t have called to tell me? What’s wrong?”

“I-I need to give this to you in person. Maddie, read the letter.”

“I’m so sorry.” She repeats over and over as I do.

~