Am I Wrong?

Chapter 36:

July: 15
Well today is the day.
All 10 of the boys plus Chelsea are currently at my house. Today is the day that marks my parents 9 years of not being here physically. Yes I know right one they are in heaven watching over me and they are either proud of me or are wondering what the hell I am doing with my life. Hopefully the first option. (* I KNOW THE HEAVEN STUFF IS VERY ARGUMENTATIVE WITH CERTAIN RELIGIONS SO PLEASE NO HATE!*) I don't think I'm an awful teenager. I had good grades last year. I take care of my body. I am respectful to others. Not to be stuck up.
We are going to the cemetery in 10 minutes then were all going to lunch at Panera.
Right now I am wearing a Crochet sleeve Babydoll dress from Forver 21 with a pair of gray sandals from Steve Madden. My hair is just it's natural state and I am wearing a little bit of mascara. I picked out my moms favorite flowers which were pink roses and walked to the car with everyone following behind.
When we arrive to their graves I start to tear up. I used to walk here everyday in 8th grade. I would just sit for a little and talk to my mom and dad about my grades and soccer.
I put the flowers down and gently put my hand on the 2 stones. I start to cry. Cameron kneels down next to me and rubs small circles in my back while pulling my head into his chest. I sit down criss cross apple sauce and start talking.
"You know when I was little I wanted to play high school soccer and have my dad be my #1 supporter. I pictured him walking around with me after a game telling me what I did well and what I could've done better. I would've loved to have him screaming at games when the ref makes a bad call. As for my mom I always pictured her the gossiper like the moms on Dance moms. She would've been well known on the team and would've had a shirt with my name and number on it. That's just the kinda parents I pictured them being.
When I was learning how to ride a bike at age 7 my dad told me that even if he let go he knew I could do it. I have always remembered that and kept telling myself that I am okay. I can be the amazing daughter that they dreamed of during the 9 months that I was in my moms stomach. My mom tucked me in every single night and when she did she would tuck me in like a little burrito. Until one night when I was laying down and my mom and dad were fighting about money and she didn't do the burrito. I didn't realize how much that little gesture every night would mean to much to me until I didn't get to have it anymore. My parents and me especially are so grateful for the Pares to take me in. I don't know what I would've done if I didn't have a set of reliable role models to look up to. You never know what you had until it's gone. I love and miss both my mommys and both of my daddy's." I say bawling. My mom walks over to me and she's crying as well she hugs me so tight. I feel a tug on my dress and look down to see Evan holding a Lilly flower. He hands it to me and I kneel down to give him a big bear hug. My mom and dad say a few words about how much they promised and promise to take care of me.
Everyone huddles up into a huge group hug and I am in the middle of course.
"Can't breathe" I say trying to catch my breath. Laughing. Everyone release and we all walk to the car. I walk and in hand with Cameron and Evan. When we get to Panera I know my eyes are red and puffy but I don't really care. I order a sandwich and a cookie. We talk about how summer is ending and how we want to go to Venice tomorrow. We don't have another Magcon till August 1st. I'm looking forward to this break with my family and friends.
July 16:
I wake up in my old room with a headache. I go on my phone and go on twitter and favorite and retweet and follow some people. I decide to film a Q&A so I send out a tweet saying "@elena_bryant18 hey beautiful followers! I'm filming a Q&A today since I'm not feeling to hot so tweet me some questions using the hashtag #askelena! 💜💋" I have a text from Cameron asking if I'm okay.
Me: yeah I'm okay, just have a headache.
Babe🐻💜: is it that time of the month? 😉😘
Me: don't push me Dallas
Babe🐻💜: I'll be over in 20.
Kay then haha.

I hear a knock on my door and he walks in holding a bag from Target. He takes everything out and lays it out on my bed.
-sour patch kids
-Arizona
-Oreos
-chocolate covered pretzels.
-tampons
Wow this boy knows me good. He hops into bed next to me after I thank him and kiss him. I am on my MacBook reading and screenshoting tweets for my video which I will be filming with Cam now.
One came up that kinda shocked me "@yesxcam is it true that you slept with Galinsky?" I don't know where anyone came up with that idea. I reply to her and say no that never happened.
Cameron and I film the video and it ends up pretty funny actually just because he kept messing around. We fell sleep watching mean girls and I wake up and go pee then I run downstairs to see Tyler watching Oregon Vs UCLA football. I see that UCLA is winning obviously because they are the best college team out there in my opinion ;)
I run upstairs and jump on Cameron. It was only 4 o'clock.
"Can we please go to the park I neeeeed to play soccer, I feel like I haven't played in forever." Which is partly true because I haven't played since June and that is a long break. I think I want to join an adult team just to stay active since I won't be playing in high school.
"Sure lets go" he says and stands up.
I change into some black nike shorts and an old plain white tee shirt. I Dutch braid my hair and put on my old high school socks and roll them down then put on my bright yellow cleats. I grab 4 waters for us and my ball then we jump into the car. I first start off with dribbling around for a while practicing my pull backs and my moves. Cameron brought a ball too so he could practice. He was actually really good. He would definitely make varsity if he went to high school. We decide to set up a 1 on 1 scrimmage and after about 30 minutes of playing we are tied 3-3. I am being extra aggressive since he's a boy and I don't like to loose. So I say next goal wins. I start at my goal line then dribble down to half line then he comes up on my back and I do a pull back right past him. He catches up to me and grabs my waist and picks me up and spins me around. He leans in to kiss me and as soon as our lips are less than a centimeter away he drops me and I fall flat on my butt. He is dribbling down the line and next thing I see he scores. I get up and jump on his back and he starts running around. I didn't even notice it was starting to get dark. Day light savings. Ugh. We sit down and talk about how he cheated for a while then we home. I so should've won.