Waiting (Gauge Burek)

Memories

Chloe POV:
"Hey baby" Gauge smiles and kisses me as I welcome him into my apartment.
"Hi" I smile weakly at him.
"So what did you wanna talk about" he asks grabbing a water bottle and sitting on the couch. I follow after him and sit beside him swinging my legs over his.
"There's something I should have told you when we first started dating but I didn't want it to affect everything and I was so happy with you but it doesn't matter I should have told you anyway." I start, pausing for him to tell me to continue.
"Okay..." he says sounding more suspicious than before.
"Timothée and I have been friends since high school yes but we also did date after high school. We were in love once, at least I was but we found we worked better as friends and didn't want to lose each other so we called it quits. " I say looking down at my hands.
"I knew you guys dated Star. You do realize that he's a celebrity and there's articles about him all the time right?" He laughs. "I just knew you would bring it up when you were ready to tell me." He says shrugging it off.
I sit there doe eyed. I didn't think about any articles.
"Thank you for being so understanding but that's not all..."
FLASHBACK:
"the caller has a voicemail box that has not been set up-" I sigh as I put my phone down again. Staring at Timothée's contact name. We're still on our getaway in L.A. The city where I fell in love with him. I told him today and he said it back. I was expecting tonight to go a little different. Turns out he had a meeting with a producer at some bar and he's been gone since 7 pm and it's now 2am. I sigh plugging my phone in and get up to take a shower. I'm used to the late nights but now I feel like something is wrong. I start the shower before walking in letting the water soothe my body. My mind of course is still racing with worry. After a few minutes I decide to just go to sleep. Walking out of the bathroom I hear fumbling in the hotel room. I slowly walk towards the sound only to see Timothée pinning some girl up to the wall making out with her like there's no tomorrow. IN OUR HOTEL ROOM. On OUR getaway. After WE said I love you. Which obviously means nothing.
"Timothée?" My voice betrays me and cracks showing tears about to spill.
He whips his head around nearly falling over at the sight of me.
"Chloe! I didn't know you were here... this is um-" he pauses turning back to the girl "what's your name?"
"Grace" she says shooting me a smile.
"Well Grace I suggest you give us a few minutes. Don't worry Tim will still be here for you when I'm done talking to him" I smile arrogantly at her as she rolls her eyes and stomps her way into the bathroom.
"No Chloe nothing happened we don't need to talk about it we can be happy. I love you!" He looks at me with pleading eyes trying to make his way over to be but tripping over some clothes.
"I said I love you today. AND I MEANT IT. How could you do this to me Timothée!!" I start yelling. I'm so angry but even more hurt that my own best friend would do this to me after he's seen me cry over guys who've done this shit before.
"No Chloe I love you it didn't mean anything!" He yells back at me.
"You don't love me. Did you ever? I have loved you for years. YEARS TIMOTHÉE. Would you have slept with her if I didn't walk in?" I ask the last question barely above a whisper.
"I- I don't know Chlo I'm drunk I didn't know what I was doing" he begs pulling my arm towards him and grabbing my face with the other hand trying to make me look at him.
"Why? Am I not good enough?" I ask looking him in the eye, a tear betraying me and sliding down my cheek.
"What no God Chloe you are perfect in every way I just-" he starts, stammering over his words.
"THEN WHY" I yell again.
"BECAUSE I WAS FUCKING SCARED ALRIGHT. I've never loved a girl before and I didn't want to fuck up our friendship but I do I do love you Chloe but I can't risk loosing you!" He's getting angry now. Like I'm the one in the wrong.
"Well you just did." I walk away grabbing my bag and phone as I do. I look back at him one more time.
"Goodbye Timothée."
"No Chloe don't go we can fix-" he starts but I shut the hotel room door before he can finish.
END FLASHBACK:
"Oh my god Star I had no idea that's why you guys broke up I'm so sorry he did that to you." Gauge puts his arms around me pulling me into his lap and kissing my forehead as tears roll down my face. "That's why you were so cautious to get involved with me?" He says more as a question.
"Yes" I cry into his chest.
"Can I ask you something?" He says pulling my chin towards him kissing both my cheeks. I nod in response. "Do you still love him?" He looks away afraid of my answer. It's my turn to pull his chin towards me.
"No." I say confidently. "It took my over a year to ever speak to him again and the only reason I ever did again is because he was my best friend." I admit.
"Okay. Thank you for telling me Star. You know I love you right? I will never do anything like that to you baby. I can't imagine my life without you now." He smiles down at me.
"I love you too Gauge." I smile digging my head into his neck. With his arms around me I've never felt so safe from any hurt in the world. Gauge is who I belong with.