Titan Beauty (Levi x Reader)

42. Heritage

Slowly the room emptied out after Levi had left.

Especially the younger soldiers, mainly those of the 104th squad, were mentally about to buckle under the weight of the conversation that had just taken place. They had been through a hell of a lot the past couple weeks already. They had gone from being on stand-by, without gear, to evacuating all nearby villages after hearing that Wall Rose was supposedly breached. After that, they had been ambushed at Utgard Castle where they were hiding out. And after that, they had an excessive amount of treachery to deal with, along with an intensive battle against Reiner in titan form, and then they went back to being on stand-by in the hidden location they were now, but this...

They had just received the news that sooner or later, they would be expected to take part in shedding human blood. Yes, for the greater good, for humanity, but they were essentially being asked to become murderers. No, not asked, ordered. One day or another.

Then again... (y/n), Eren and Mikasa, as well as their respective Captain, already had blood in their book...

(y/n) left later than most others, seemingly frozen stuck to her seat. Many memories, as well as the long-hidden feelings she had had after committing murder all those years back, were reopened after a 30 minute conversation. When she finally noticed the room was practically deserted, she got up as well. She walked to the porch softly, unconsciously craving the outside so she'd feel a little less trapped.

As she got out there, she noticed two things. Firstly, that the weather was absolute shit. Despite it being morning, it might as well have looked as the beginning of evening. The dark, thick clouds were cancelling out any sunshine. Secondly, she saw Connie, leaning against the wooden fence enclosing the porch. He looked extremely troubled, as well as worried and most of all, he looked hurt. She didn't know which of the two things was more depressing. When she shut the door behind her, walking up to him as he turned to her, she could easily decide. Connie's large eyes seemed to glisten more than usual.

"Connie..." she muttered sadly, slightly taken aback. He frowned as he saw her pitiful expression, turning his gaze back to in front of him as she copied his pose beside him.

"Is it about what Captain Levi just said..?" she asked carefully. He took a second to answer. After swallowing his emotions back a little, he spoke.

"No... It's just... That 'Beast Titan', Ymir and you guys talked about? Well, according to Eren, Ymir said that that thing is what turned my entire village into-, into titans. It just... sickens me." She listened to him speak, and watched his hands clench into hard fists, shaking with rage.

He knew he was leaving (y/n) with a bunch of concerns she couldn't do anything with, but he knew he had to speak to someone. But how do you console someone after what he had just been through?

(y/n) and him were close, just like most people were close within the 104th squad. He was perhaps closest with her after Sasha. He trusted (y/n) as much, anyway. He cared for Sasha differently, though, which was the reason he hadn't burdened her with his troubles yet.

The short silence was filled up by the patter of raindrops beginning to hit the thin wooden roof above them.

"I don't know what to tell you... I can hardly imagine anything worse... And this could be perhaps the worst advice you ever hear, so please don't hate me, but... How about we focus on using this anger we have to our advantage? I've... lost both my parents to the titans, my father having died because of Reiner and Berthold's treason. Eren's lost his mother... Mikasa has lost both her parents tragically as well and Levi-," she stopped for a second, having to remain careful with what she said, "well, Captain Levi has lost more than we can hope to imagine, I think... And look at those three. They fight with such determination that it's terrifying." she muttered, also looking ahead. She hoped dearly that she wasn't being too insensitive. "I don't mean to come off as crass..." she added softly.