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I tried my best to cope with the news I learned. I closed my mouth more and stayed to myself. My mom has been fussing about how I'm not doing my class work or anything in that sort. I stopped going to practice as well. I run track and I play soccer occasionally when it's the time of the year, but currently I haven't been really feeling up to par with those activities. I just rather lay in bed and cry myself to sleep. How could she lie to me in my face multiple times? If she loved me so much she wouldn't have lied so many times. I haven't spoken to her recently. She's been reaching out checking up on me but I haven't been replying.

I sat in the car hearing my mom speak once again about how I need to get it together and how I need  to change my attitude before she does it before me. To be quite honest I really don't care for what is being said.

"... do you understand? You can't just have it your way all the time jas you have to allow others to be able to express themselves"

I shrugged my shoulders not really caring once again

"What has gotten into you lately?"

"Puberty" I answered laying my head against the elbow of the couch

"That's still no excuse. You have to learn how to control your emotions. You can't lash out on people okay?"

"I guess" I said watching teen titans go. She sighed walking away giving up. I have nothing to say. If I did I would say something. Today is supposed to be a family reunion and I'm supposed to be getting ready but here I am not caring and just laying here. My mom told me multiple times to get dressed but I rather not. I rather not be around my family at all. How can my own blood act like they aren't my blood for my whole life? How can my grandmother not act like my grandmother or my auntie act like my auntie?

The last episode finally went off so I got up and decided to get dress.

♠️
I walked up to the swing set and sat down with my plate of food. I didn't have much on my plate just some ribs and collard greens. I sat swinging slowly picking at my food. Brianna came and sat next to me
"You okay cousin?"

I nodded my head.

"You wanna talk about it?" She asked

I shook my head, "I have muscle pain that's all"

She nodded her head. I took a good look at my cousin. She is so damn pretty. I wish I could look as good as her when I get older.

She nodded her headed, "well the best thing I can say for that is to just ignore it

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She nodded her headed, "well the best thing I can say for that is to just ignore it. I know it's more going on with you because you're normally so dang happy cuz. But right now your energy is just off ya feel me?"

I kept to myself thinking of the words she just said, "hey" I said when she began to walk away, "why do people lie?"

She smiled, "because they are either afraid of the truth, how the truth may affect others or they are just a horrible person"

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