DECEMBER.
Entry# 358
December 23rd. Two days before Christmas. Diary, I mean 23rd, I decide to put some decorations on you so you wouldn't look dull in my eyes. Is it awesome? Haha. I really think I have gone beyond insane. Well, I've never really been myself ever since she left.
It's been a month and half since she left. Is this how it feels? How is it you called again? Heartbreak? I hate to admit this but I miss her. I miss her presence, her laugh, her smile. Everything. I hate having this feeling even with the fact that I didn't even lose her. She's not mine to begin with, right? There's nothing like us in the first place so what's with the drama, Jennie?
Argh. Give my heart a break, Lisa. Goddamn, I think it's starting to make me really crazy.
★
I stared at myself on the mirror and forced a smile before taking my diary on my table. It's our Christmas break and... it's been a month and half since Lisa left. At the first month, everyone was just the same as me. We all looked like lamenting, knowing she left without saying her goodbye to us. She left and went back to Thailand.
Is Thailand even near in Korea? Ugh. I slapped my forehead for thinking that, knowing I don't even have the money to board a plane even if it's near. Surely, I will only get lost there if ever I went to that place.
I tiredly greeted my brother who's cooking something in the kitchen. "Where's Chu?" I asked when I didn't saw our sister again. I start to fill my cup with the coffee he prepared as I wait for his answer.
V hummed and hissed when the oil touched his skin. "She said she'll be fetching her friend in airport this afternoon." he answered. I nodded at him and opened my diary.
He turned the heat low before turning around to face me. "Who is it again? Li? I know it starts with L tho." he trailed and lean his body at the counter. "Li? La? Ugh. I forgot." he groaned and scratched his head.
I choked when I heard what he said. He immediately moves behind me and lightly tapped my back. It is not her right? I asked myself. Of course, there were many people who have name that begins with L. Why would assume it's her? It's impossible. I bitterly laughed on that thought. Lisa. Lisa. Lisa. Argh. When will you stop bugging me?
A car horn and the turning off of the engine can be heard outside. "Oh. That must be them. Can you check on them while I finish this, J?" V said as he returned back on what he's doing. I sighed before getting off my seat, not forgetting to grab my notebook before V sees it.
"Chu?" I called on her when I saw her outside and standing beside her car. The compartment of her bag was open and I can only see the head of her friend.
Chu turned to my direction and motioned to me to come closer to her. "Oh? Jennie. Good timing, you're here." she grabbed my shoulder and wrapped her arms as she waits for her companion to finished what she's doing.
Chu poked my cheeks and spoke. "I want to introduce to you..." When the compartment lowered and showed Jisoo unnie's friend's face, my mind stopped and my heart starts to thumped frantically.
Goodness, please tell me I'm not dreaming. Standing there attractive as ever, Lisa with her short and new dyed ash-gray hair. She looked at me in surprise and rapidly blinked her eyes before smiling at me.
"Jennie? Earth to Jennie? Ppoong?" I felt constant poke on my cheeks that brought me back to reality. I carefully remove her arms around me and turned to Chu.
"I-I n-need to go, Unnie." I stuttered before hastily walked—no—run away from them.
That's Lisa? I quickly stole a glance on them, seeing her staring at me in confusion. Hell, that's really Lisa?
"Jennie, is it—hey? Why are you in a hurry?" V shouted when he caught me frantically make my way to my room.
"Nothing!" I shouted back to lessen his suspicion. I literally jumped on my bed and screamed on my pillow. I lay on my back and zoned out while staring at the ceiling of my room.
Why is she here? How did she become Jisoo unnie's friend? Does she know that I'm Chu's sister? I abruptly got up and punched my pillow in frustration. Of course, I wouldn't know the answer to all of those questions even if I wanted to.
Lisa. I held my head and tapped it repeatedly when I felt it throbbed. I sighed then I gently tapped my chest after when it start aching again. Lisa's effect. I thought and pouted.
I slumped back on my bed again, still holding my chest. "Calm down, heart." I mumbled and continued tapping it, hoping it calm the rapid beating. I groaned and buried my head on my pillow, screaming again in frustration.
How can I face her now? I turned to my bedside table and mindlessly reached for my diary. Hmm? Wait? Where is it? I pushed myself up and glanced on the table. I looked around and slapped my forehead when I remembered something.
Fuck. Did I unconsciously drop it somewhere?
I dramatically sighed and stood up. I was about to opened my door when I hear Chu's voice outside. "You can stay here for now. By the way, that's Jennie's room across yours." she said.
I grunted and lean my head on my door. Now, great. I'm really doomed. "Sooya, I'll go inside first. I still need to fix my things. Thank you for letting me stay again." I heard Lisa said and Chu suddenly exclaimed.
I curiously frowned and opened my door slightly. "Yah! Yah! Get off me, you monkey!" Chu was pushing Lisa who's hugging her right now and the latter just laugh before letting go and raising her hands up. I smiled at the sight. I miss that laugh. When Lisa accidentally glanced on my direction, I immediately closed the door and fanned myself. That was close.
After minutes of standing near my door and waiting for them to leave, I slowly opened my door and looked around. Good, coast clear. I sighed and walked down our house. I need to find my diary first so that no one can read that. I can deal with Lisa later.
I start to looked around the house. I swear I was holding it before I went to greet Jisoo unnie. Argh. Where did I lose it? I just hope no one saw it because if someone did, I will certainly strangle them.
YOU ARE READING
DEAR DIARY [JENLISA]✔️
FanfictionWherein every 23rd of month, Jennie writes something about Lisa on her diary. [JENLISA]