media // will x alex

// 16

throughout the past couple of days alex needed something to cope with the heartbreak. liquor and cigarettes was pretty much consuming all his time. he had never felt so low.
   his friends had tried calling him and texting him. even james's fuckbuddy has tried to call him but he wouldn't pick up. he knew his friends would try to tell him everything was okay and that he just needs cheering up.
wills recent post had made alex's feelings ten times worse. he knew will smoked but he rarely seen him do it, within the months they had known each other alex had only seen him smoke five times. he even found himself smoking less then he ever had. will was like his own personal nicotine. whenever he was around him it was the same relief but instead of feeling tar slowly build up in his lungs it was always a warm feeling in his heart.
as he lay in his own despair he heard his phone go off, he wasn't in the mood and really didn't want to answer but he looked at the send. it was james again

WillNE

WillNE
i'm ready to talk

ImAllexx
say something then

WillNE
no, i want to talk in person

ImAllexx
fine, tomorrow near the old bridge
at 1:30. don't dare miss it because i
don't know if i'll be able to face you

WillNE
i'll be there, and don't say that
alex...please don't say that

ImAllexx
i'm not saying anything just yet,
just make sure you're there

WillNE
i will, i promise
//seen 2:41//

alex?
//seen 3:02//

alex could feel his heart quite literally shatter. he didn't mean to be so rude to will he just felt betrayed. he had kissed him by his choice after he had confessed his feelings and he just pushed him away. he could feel a tear building up in his eye. he wanted will back, even if it was just as friends. the truth was he was so happy when will had text him again but a part of him told him not to be happy. that he shouldn't give him a second chance because he still won't believe him.
he hadn't had a shower since the day everything happened and he was pretty sure thou could tell. the taste of alcohol was permanently burnt into his throat and the smell of cigarettes cling to the clothes he had been in for the past 5 days.
he decided to go to bed, he needed it and he wanted to be somewhat sober for meeting up with will again. he was going to try and have a shower but he didn't know if he would wake up in time before needing to meet will. maybe not having a shower would show will what he had done to him. he didn't blame will solely for what happened but he was definitely apart of it.
he made his way upstairs to his bed and left his phone downstairs. he didn't want any random texts from any of his mates or even will trying to cheer him up. it would just make him get less
sleep.
his bed was still messy from the previous nights he hadn't made it. the covers were hanging off one side and there was a couple crisp packets in the bed. it definitely wasn't a pretty sight but he didn't mind. he didn't care. he just got into the bed and shut his eyes, trying not to think of the things that had kept him up for countless nights.

morning rolled around and alex had woken up at 12. he had an hour and a half before having to walk to the bridge to meet will. he quickly had a shower and put on a white pair of jeans and a pink hoodie. he orginally wasn't going to shower but he decided that was a bit cruel on will and probably not very hygienic.
he looked at himself in the mirror. his hair looked a lot better since he ha da shower but his eyes were still surrounded in bags and pink, puffy skin from the crying. he checked his phone which he had quickly retrieved from downstairs before his shower.
the time was 1:00 so he should probably start walking down to the bridge.
he grabbed his coat and draped it over his shoulders before opening his door and locking it, making his way down to the place where the man he had fell for so quickly would be stood. the man who didn't believe him when he broke his heart.

he arrived at the bridge and there he stood. he was wearing that same damn beanie he always wore and a black hoodie which was so basic but it looked amazing on him. his hair was a little scruffy but that made him all the more attractive. the sight of will was something alex could barely handle but he knew he had to talk to him. he had to try and clear everything that had happened and see if they could work everything out. they didn't babe to be involved romantically alex just wanted his best friend back.
that's all he wanted.
he took a step and then another step towards will, trying his best not to break into tears with each second that pasted.
they were now standing a meter apart from each other and alex didn't have the will power to speak to will first.
"hey alex." he other man said quietly. he stunk of alcohol just was much as alex did and the smell of the cigarette smoke was stronger on him then it was alex. it broke alexs heart to know will was so down. he wanted to help him.

"hey will." he replied. things were very awkward and neither of them knew what to say, it was like meeting your long distance cousin at a wedding and not knowing what to say.

"i'm sorry i didn't believe you alex, i really should have but i just felt so broke from the night before when you hadn't said anything that i just felt like you were saying it to try and cheer me up. like you felt bad for me or something." he sighed out, taking a step closer to alex. he looked at him straight in the eye hoping to get some form of a response out of alex.

"i just didn't know what to say will. i'd had some feelings for you since we had met but i didn't want to tell you let alone feel them. i felt that if i had those feelings for you then it would get between our friendship. seems like it did." he started tearing up and his voice was breaking. he couldn't take it he wasn't strong enough but he wasn't going to leave. he needed clarification for his own mind, so he can return to normal and not be wallowing away in his own pit of despair.
wills heart broke into two, he didn't know what to do. he put a hand underneath alexs chin and slowly leant in to kiss him. their lips touched and everything felt normal again. like it was how it should be. alex continued to kiss will until he pulled away.
"i'm sorry alex, i shouldn't have done that." will took a step back and looked at the floor.

"no will! it's was fine. i liked it." he blushed a little, putting his hand behind his neck and looking to the floor.

"shut up alex, stop lying to me!" will screamed, as he started to pace backwards and forwards.
"i'm sorry alex, no i've got to go."

"no will- WAIT-" alex tired to grab wills hand but he just brushed him off and walked away. alex just fell to the floor and started crying. he couldn't move and he couldn't breath. he just cried for what felt like hours. he got himself together and ran back home so he could try and message will on instagram.