Deciding My Direction (on hold to edit)

Fix You

Holding my breath, I opened my window slowly. My phone rubbing a bruise and a cut on my leg through my pocket, my teeth clenching as I slipped out the window and cuddled my jacket close to me. I was going to get killed for this later but I don't care. I need to go. I payed for my ticket and I worked for it and I need to.

And Niall would start asking questions if I didn't. I don't want any questions. Questions demand answers and I have no answers to give him and none I want to give him. I don't want to explain anything.

"Niall?" I answered my phone, walking down the sidewalk and sniffling lightly.

"Princess! Hey we're in soundcheck and I have a car on it's way to pick you up. Louis said he was going to ride with Paul so you wouldn't feel all lonely. I'm excited to see you. You get to sit in soundcheck with us!" Niall rushed excitedly. i could hear his supras hitting the ground over and over again as he jumped. as much as i hated it, it made my lips curve up sightly.

"He didnt have to do that." I said, stopping where I was and waiting. Lou knew exactly where the safe zone was.

"He wanted to. I have more to check so I couldn't come. He knew it and if I'm going to be honest, he misses you. I do too." Lie.

"I miss you guys too." Truth.

"I miss hugging you and kissing you. Hurry and get here."

"You can blame it all on Lou." I said, humming slightly to myself.

"He should be there by now. He's so slow." I heard him whine just as I saw the car pulling onto the street.

"He's here now. We'll talk later, okay?"

"Okay. See you babe." Niall said happily. I could hear Zayn and Harry in the backround.

"Deal. Bye Ni." I said, ruffling my hair a little and hearing him make some nonunderstandable sound that sounded like he was happy.

"You called me Ni."

"Yeah?" I said, climbing into the backseat of the car.

"I like it. Bye princess. See you soon."

"Okay. Byeee." I said, hanging up and looking at Lou. He had this huge, dorky grin on his face. I smiled a little, my lips going up and up more as his did. He hugged me tightly, the bruises all over me sobbing in pain but my body didn't care, it hugged him back. My fingers gripped into his shirt and my head buried into his shoulder and neck, his in my hair.

"I missed you. Lots. I worried." He whispered, light kisses pressing into my hair.

"I missed you too." I mumbled back, my eyes shut tight and blocking out the pain in my arms and back.

"Oh, oh I'm sorry." He mumbled, letting go and backing up in his seat a little.

"For?" I said, the pain smacking me.

"Hurting you. I can tell. Here, turn around." He told me, spinning his hand to show me how he wanted me to move.

"No."

"Angel."

"NO."

"Angel, please." He begged, hands clasped together. I sighed, turning slightly and pulling my shirt up from the top, most of my back bare to him. I heard him make a sound at the back of his throat, his fingers lightly tracing over the hand shaped bruises and foot shaped bruises, the ones that had no shape at all, the ones that I couldn't feel anymore and the ones I could feel but couldn't see.

"What is... What... Poppy..." Louis stumbled over ever word until I dropped my shirt and turned around, not daring to face him.

"Lou, I don't want to talk about it."