𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐋𝐔𝐃𝐄𝐃

CHAPTER TWENTY

Twenty

    "What's up? What's going on?" Edison asked as she showed up on Nora's doorstep. Thankfully, her parents were out on a date night so there was no awkward explaining to do. The girl was wearing a sweatshirt and ripped jeans with her long dark hair back in a ponytail with her bangs sticking out and Nora hated how attractive she looked because she was supposed to be mad. Looking at her confused expression, though, it was hard to remember why she was upset in the first place, but the sinking feeling in her stomach reminded her. God, she was so hopeless when it came to all the feelings she had for the girl standing in front of her.

    Silently, Nora opened the door wide enough and motioned for Edison to step inside. All she said was, "Upstairs, first door on the right."

    Edison looked confused, but followed instructions nonetheless as Nora closed the door gently behind them. Once they got upstairs, Nora closed that door as well and leaned against it while the other took a seat in her desk chair.

    "What's this about, Nora?" the girl asked as she observed their environment. "Cute room, by the way. Seems very... you."

    "Listen, I don't know if this has been something you've been doing consciously or not, but it's making me feel like shit the more I think about it, so I guess I'm finally womaning up and talking about it," Nora sighed as she maintained her distance. She grabbed a hair tie off of her bedside table and tied her hair up in an effort to get her to stop running her fingers through it before she starts balding from her habits. Trying to force these words up her throat was not going well, which made her more upset. This was Edison. She could trust Edison. Yet part of her was still unsure if that was true.

    "Are you gonna tell me what it is... or?"

    "Why have you been hiding me?" Seeing the confused expression on the other girl's face, Nora elaborated. "You barely talk to me outside of when you're picking me up at three in the morning to go talk about the meaning of life. It's like being a booty call without the fun part. What's been going on with you? With us? Or whatever you wanna call it, which seems to be nothing. I put myself out on the line for you, but now I just feel like some dirty little secret."

    As soon as Nora explained it, recognition crossed Edison's face. She knew exactly what the girl was talking about. The way she avoided eye contact was enough to realize that Nora wasn't going crazy.

    "I'm sorry for making you feel that way, I promise it's not because I'm embarrassed of you or anything like that, trust me," she apologized, her eyes finally meeting Nora's, looking unsure.

    "That's just the thing, I don't know if I can trust you," Nora forced the truth she was fighting out past her lips as she swallowed the lump in her throat. "And it sucks to have to say that after everything. Especially after what you told me, I believe that I do, but I just... I don't know. I feel like you're starting to regret the things that have come of us being friends. Like you wish we just stayed friends, but I just had to fuck it up by kissing you and I—"

    She was cut off by the total word vomit she was producing when Edison stood up out of the desk chair, grabbed her gently by the chin and pressed their lips together. This seemed to be an effective method of shutting her up considering she melted the moment their lips touched. Her hands wrapped around the back of Edison's neck as the girl's other hand rested on her hip. If Nora was ever worried about faking her sexuality crisis, kissing Edison was always major reassurance.

    When Edison pulled away, Nora stayed flat against the door, but her body language was calmer and both girls were just barely out of breath. Edison was the first to speak as she moved to sit on Nora's bed, "Sorry that was uncalled for. You have no idea how glad I am that we became more than friends and I couldn't think of how else to prove it to you. It's not that I'm embarrassed or ashamed of you, Nor. I sound like some fucking incel, but I don't feel like I'm worthy of you. Like you're gonna be embarrassed of me because I'm not just a girl, I'm also not your type. I mean, you just got out of a relationship with a football player and those guys are like my destined enemies. I just... I feel like I'm never going to be your type of girl."

    Nora didn't know what to say as she did her best to absorb the words being spoken as best she could. She had no idea that Edison was feeling so similarly to her. If neither of them felt worthy each other, then what were they doing? Nora hated how much control she lost when it came to Edison. She had no idea where to go from here because she had never been here before. The worst part of gaining experience was having to experience it first. Absolutely zero part of Nora knew what to say in this moment, but she felt awful just standing there. There was so much more she wanted to say and do. Where to start was the only part she was confused about. So, she pulled a page out of Edison's playbook.

    Stepping away from the door, she grabbed Edison's jaw gently, cupping her cheeks softly. However, there was nothing gentle about the way they kissed. They were set aflame the moment their lips touched. The passion there between the two of them was undeniable. Without even thinking, Nora pushed the two of them back onto the bed and as if on instinct, Edison flipped them over so she was on top. Now this feeling as new as she felt Edison's fingertips graze her bare skin where her shirt had ridden up. Part of her was yearning for her hand to go further up, but at the same time this was so terribly new she had no idea what she was truly getting herself into. That fact, however, was irrelevant as Edison's lips trailed down to her neck and oh, did she like that feeling.

    The moment was shattered due to the startling noise of Nora's bedroom door being opened. Panicking, the two girls separated faster than lightning, but it was too late. Nora's mother stood in the doorway and judging by her expression, she saw just enough to know what was going on there.

    "Nora Irene Watson, care to explain what the hell is going on here?" her mother exclaimed as her and Edison sheepishly avoided eye contact. "And I believe it's time for your friend here to leave."

    Wisely, Edison said nothing as she left except for a quick goodbye to Nora. As soon as she was out of the room, Nora saw her phone lying on the desk light up with a message and she resisted the urge to smile knowing it was most likely a text from Edison. Still, the overwhelming dread of whatever her mother was going to say was enough to stifle her joy. It, however, wasn't enough to stifle the lasting warmth on her skin or the slight tingling of her lips.

    "Before you say anything," Nora spoke bravely, not sure where she was going with this, "I didn't want you to find out this way. I wanted to tell you properly I just..."

    "Didn't plan on us being home, I get it," her mother sighed with a tone gentler than Nora expected. "I wish I could say I saw this coming from you, but this one is a doozy. Just... boys or girls, door stays open and a parent has to be home. Even though you're eighteen, you still live under my roof and follow my rules. I, however, will refute this as your official coming out if you would like a do-over on your own terms. I do want you to know that although this is going to be very new to your dad and I, you are our daughter and we will love you no matter what."

    With that, her mother closed the door and left.

    Nora fell flat on the bed with her hands over her face, muttering to herself, "What the fuck is my life now?"