Revery of Madness (Doctor Who)

I - A little hope

The effect was worse than the first time. A vague thought told Roka it had to be because of the proximity to the crystal, but in the end it didn't matter. For the fraction of a moment time was frozen, afterimages mimicked all of their movements, the air was thick and didn't let her breath. She wanted to grab tighter onto the Master's arm, but couldn't move.

It stopped in an instant, a jolt shooting through Roka as if it were lightning. She collapsed to the ground and rolled onto her back, a muffled scream choking out from her lungs at the sudden pain. She couldn't even pinpoint where it came from, it was just everywhere at once. But now she also remembered, recalled the last bit of missing memory and knew, would she not stop him here, this future would never happen.

Even if it meant for her to probably die here, now.

"Master," she whimpered, managed to roll to the side and curl herself together.

The sight of Roka was too much, ripped its way through the fog of frenzy and madness and the noise. He halted in his steps, turned around and rushed back to kneel down beside her.

"Seems to need a really serious amount of damage to trigger your healing," he remarked, curiosity and a little worry fighting within him.

"It's not true anymore," she ground out. "It stopped. Master, you mustn't..." Roka winced in pain and curled herself to an even smaller ball, hands clutched around herself.

"Don't tell me what I must and mustn't," he growled and tilted his head with a slight smile. "Can't you see it? All the possibilities? Can't you hear it calling?!" He giggled again to himself, feeling the rush of anticipation, the adrenalin of what might be. He heard it, heard it call for him, drumming in his ears like...

Roka grabbed his arm and tore herself up at him, wiping away coughed-up blood and tears with her sleeve in the process. "You have to stop," she pleaded. "I don't want to lose this. I lost you once, I got you back, and I don't want to miss a second of it. Even if it all ends here."

His heartbeat was so loud in his ears, so bloody loud he couldn't think clearly. Ever since he had seen her memories they beat that loud. It drove him mad, forced him to action, urged him forward.

His heartbeat... he refused to accept, still denied himself reality.

It wasn't possible. It wasn't allowed to be possible.

But Roka could fix it. If only he could get a hold of those regenerative powers, so different to a Time Lord's, yet so much more helpful in his particular case.

What was it she had just said? She wouldn't die anyway, what... He felt her small body against his, how she dragged herself to her knees and leaned against him, both hands on his chest, then cradling his face, her eyes boring into his.

There wasn't much life left in them. The last jump must have broken her body badly.

"Master, listen." Her voice was the only thing beside his heartbeat he could actually hear. "You're not yourself. I don't know what..."

Something rushed past the two, a shadow in dark clothes. Now Roka could see it too, without being reminded first. Because she already remembered. The Master shot to his feet, was so eager to run after the intruder, but she held onto him with all her remaining - steadily fading - strength.

"You mustn't harm her!" she called out. "Just leave!"

"Don't tell me what I... her?"

He fell silent. So suddenly and final that time seemed to stumble again. His head turned, first to the person stretching out her hand to the crystal, then to Roka.