Ten reasons -Jikook

Reason 8

14/4/9

Can I fix myself?

Or is there no hope?

Why am I like this ...?

What happened to the Jimin I just to be ...?

Oh.

I know.

Society ruined me.

Reason 8

I'm gay and apparently being gay is wrong. I'm not accepted by anyone it seems like. Not even army like it. I remember when I tweeted the news...

My notifications blew up with tweets like

"Kill yourself @Park.JM"

"@Park.JM Being gay is wrong, do slice your neck please"

"Just because you're that doesn't mean Jungkook will ever want you. He's straight and will find himself a beautiful wife and you're getting in the way"

That last one killed me the most, but they're right. Jungkook doesn't feel that way about me. Jikook is a bromance to him and he will probably fall in love with a beautiful woman...

Forever alone.

I slammed my journal closed and threw it across the room. "Why can't he love me ...?!" I screamed, crying as I pulled out my precious blade.

One cut for being gay.

One cut for even falling in love with Jungkook.

One cut for getting in the way of his happieness.

One cut for making the boys uncomfortable.

And one cut for even existing.

After my five cuts, I still didn't feel any better.

I felt worse.

-

I woke up to a painful feeling in my back from falling asleep on the carpet. My eyes were stinging from excessive crying and my cuts were screaming at me. I looked around the room feeling alone and started crying. Getting slowly from the floor, I walked into the bathroom in the far back of the room, slammed the door closed and stared at my reflection in the mirror.

"I'm too fat ... I need to lose some weight ..." I cried softly, staring at my body critically. I think skipping breakfast for the rest of the week should help.

No.

I'm a lost cause.

Too worthless.

Nothing can help me ...