Lovesick: Book 2

Prologue

Prologue

It is one thing to love a boy, but another for loving myself altogether.

This thought has been occupying ninety percent of my brain that is continuously lingering after more than a year since Marvin and I entered into our relationship. The remaining ten percent... well, it's about the constant overthinking on how I could make the days before my freshman year starts and make it all seem worth it.

The whole month before August, I spent my days contemplating about how this summer will be memorable for me, for my family, and for Marvin. Sa katunayan, nakaka-frustrate na walang ginagawa lalo pa at alam ko na gustong gusto kong walang ginagawa kapag pasukan na. Kung may pasok gustong gusto kong walang pasok, at kung wala naman ay atat na atat na akong magpasukan.

And in fulfillment of that, I made it happen. I am sitting on the second floor balcony of my mother's family house here in La Union, together with my Lola doing the unfinished painting we've started since I came here over a month from now.

She sipped to the cranberry juice she made for us and placed it right next to the easel after carefully examining the missing touch to her painting.

We're both making a landscape painting of the overlooking view of the beach almost a hundred of meters away from our vision. The sun is still up with its 4 p.m. radiance, giving the sea a bath of its golden rays while also warming the air brushing upon us.

Sa pakakaalala ko, mula pa sa magulang ni Lola ang bahay na ito na naipamana sa kanila noon. From the distance of this house to the beach, it can pass as a rest house or a home resort that tourists can stay in, which is a usual thing and business here whenever summer hits. But instead of leaving it on to strangers in spite of financial gains, Lola has greater sentiments not to.

Kaya naman tuwing kami ay napapadalaw dito pagdating ng summer, pakiramdam ko na karugtong ng bahay na ito ang bahay namin sa Isla City.

Lumapit sa akin si Lola at bahagyang isinandal ang kaniyang katawan upang tingnan ang progreso ko sa aking gawa.

It's been a while since I actually spent time painting like this because I've been really busy writing my last novel and its revision.

"Sigurado ka bang ayaw mong laliman pa ang kulay ng dagat?" Lola pointed out the extending horizon of the sea that I've been working on.

The horizon is lightly touched with the color of white, creating the depth of colors branching out to the spatial view illusion of the sky, a sight so pleasurable to the eyes of a viewer but not to the painter.

Siguro ito talaga ang sakit ng mga taong mahilig lumikha. Mapa-sulat, pinta, sayaw, or kanta, pakiramdam ko lagi ay may kulang sa gawa ko kahit na sa mata ng iba ay perpekto na.

"Sige po, La. Darker pa," I nodded then began biting the tip of my paintbrush trying to imagine how the darker shade of blue would fit into my almost finished canvas. Because if for any reason I shouldn't listen to someone when it comes to art, she'll be the last person I would.

"Pareho talaga kayo ng Lolo mo," paalala niya na naman.

Laging nakikita ni Lola ang hulma ko kay Lolo mula sa hugis ng ilong at mata hanggang sa mga kinakaugalian ko. Kulang nalang ay sabihan niyang ako ang reincarnation ng kaniyang asawa.

"Bakit na naman, La?" Napakunot ang noo kong nagtanong.

"Ayan," pagtuturo niya sa pagkagat ko sa aking paintbrush, "lapis, ruler, paintbrush, lahat ng pwede niyang nguyain sa tuwing labis siyang nag-iisip ay ginagawa niya," maikling siyang napatawa sa paggunita niya sa kaniyang memorya.