DAD JOKES | Showki ✓

#20 Tears

~Hyunwoo~

"What do you mean, it hurts?" I loosen my grip on him because I was worried. "Where does it hurt?" He started crying again. Hot tears fell on my shirt and made the white fabric see trough. "Here" he whispered with a desperate voice into my shirt while some new tears fell down his cheeks. He put his hand on his heart and tapped at it a few times with a wobbly hand. "Wh-what do you mean?" I asked him while cupping his face in my hands, looking him deep in the eyes.

He avoided eye contact with me. Did he really just say his heart hurts when I cuddle him? Why? Then all of a sudden I realized it. Fuck. I'm so dumb. He said he doesn't know it for a long time that he's into boys and his crush kissed another one at the same day as mark almost kissed me. So his breakdowns happened because of me? Wait. But that means that we love each other, right? My brain was about to explode. I didn't know what to say or do at all.

I looked into his swollen and red face. He still avoided eye contact. My face came closer and closer to his. This couch must be a very romantic place. It's not the first time I try to kiss him here. I pressed a fast smooch on his nose and looked at him again. He seemed so shocked about this little peck on his nose. His hands were covering the part I kissed and he looked at me, heartbroken.

"Hyunwoo, please I really can't." His voice crackled. "Kihyun, I-i-lo-v - lo-lo-lost control, sorry." Fuck. Am I really too dumb to tell him that I love him? I let go of him. He felt uncomfortable so he kept distance after my little kiss. We sat there for a few minutes. Silence. "I'm going to the bathroom." I said and left him alone in the living room.

"Hoseok, I really can't do it!" I scream-wispered into the phone so Kihyun wasn't able to hear me talking to Hoseok in the bathroom. "Hyunwoo get your shy ass up and finally do it! Otherwise I'll take you to the airport!" He threatened me. "Bu-but how should I start? Should I kiss him first or should I tell him first? Hoseok please help me!" Even if I wispered I sounded so desperate about this. "You'll feel it, Hyunwoo. You'll know what's right so PLEASE GET YOUR ASS OUT OF THE BATHROOM AND FINALLY CONFESS." He screamed through the phone so I had to put it away from my ear a bit. "Just do it, I don't want you to be sad ok?" And he ended the call without a goodbye.

I looked into the mirror one last time before I exited the bathroom. Small steps brought me back to the couch, where Kihyun formed himself to a small ball with his knees pressed on his chest and his arms wrapped around them. I placed my coward ass next to him on the couch and gulped before I started to talk. "Kihyun?" I said more confident than the last time I tried. Without waiting for an answer I continued.

"I don't know how to say that. I know you through Instagram for almost 4 years now. The first time I saw you I really liked your style and you looked very cute-" I took a deep breath in and out. He looked up to me with a shy face and waited for me to talk again. "I really tried to get your attention every time I posted these jokes under your pictures on Instagram. I know they were really dumb. But every time I posted something else you completely ignored me so I thought maybe ist the best way to get your attention. We don't know each other that good in person b-but i-i want you to be happy. I don't want to see you cry."

Kihyuns eyes were still focused on mine as a single tear left his eye again. I wiped it away and continued. "Y-you know i-... It hurts to see you cry, Kihyun. It really hurts. Is all of this because of me?" I asked. At first he responded nothing, but after a few seconds he shyly nodded. More tears rolled over his cheeks. "Do you love me?" He nodded again and he couldn't hold back his sobbing anymore. His face was buried into his knees. "It's ok, Kihyun."

I caressed his back and put him close to me. My arms around the small sad ball. I felt so bad. All of this happened because of me. He was sad because he loved me. He said that he loves me but I still couldn't be happy when he is crying so hard. I really hated myself for making him cry multiple times. He had to watch me as I almost kissed Mark in the restaurant. All this tears because of me. I really don't deserve his love at all. It hurts so much to know it was me who made him sad. I took a deep breath.

The window was open, I heard the birds singing outside. His whole body was cold. He lost all his energy while crying. My thoughts on him hit the ceiling. I couldn't handle it anymore. It was time for me to say something. "You know what?" I asked and he turned his head to look me in the eyes. "I-i-" I gulped once again and cupped his cheeks.

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