Never Enough // NH au

1.7 in which Julianna gives it all back and Niall stays quiet

warnings: ANGST! swearing, cigarette use, and more angst

Julianna didn't realize the ache she'd feel in her chest when she began packing her stuff up into boxes. Margaret didn't say much, watching her mope around the house.

Gordy and her had made this home for six months. They laughed and cried and danced and poured their hearts out between those walls. Julianna wasn't ready to say goodbye and she'd tell anyone who asked that she wasn't.

The packing day or what Julianna called dooms day, took hours. A dreary Saturday where the sky seemed to be crying. Julianna looked outside, wanting nothing more than to just crawl into bed and hide from anything that wasn't here.

Margaret did the bulk of the packing as the speed of Julianna seemed to decrease the more they put into boxes. Julianna's belongings were scarce, having not collected many things. She cared more for coffee mugs and records than meaningless clothes or decorations. She left most of her stuff at her apartment in Dublin which was waiting for her.

The final blow was when Julianna went to pack her clothes up. She found more of Niall's clothes than her own. Her heart ached as she looked at the pile of clothes on her now bare bed. The sweatshirts and t-shirts and even his sweatpants that she'd claimed as her own.

"Now what the fuck," Julianna demanded, standing up.

"What?" Margaret asked, appearing in the doorway.

"What do I do with them?" She asked weakly, hand gesturing to the clothes. "Do I give them back? Do I keep them?"

Margaret walked over to the pile of clothes, picking up a pair of navy blue boxers. "Well I'm not sure what you'd do with these. I'd give them back."

Maybe it was selfish but Julianna didn't want to give them back. She ran her fingers over the various items, breathing out a sigh. She nodded, grabbing a box off of the floor. Julianna dumped the clothes into it.

The other items she found, like a blanket that belonged to him, a coffee mug, a half eaten box of cereal, a bottle of shampoo, a notebook, and a dirty magazine Halloween edition that she wasn't sure how wound up in her possession.

Julianna tugged her jacket on, looking around the empty house. Gordy stared at her, confused, ears pulled up. She sighed, leaning down to pet him. "I'll be right back," she murmured. "Do you want to come?" Gordy perked up, tail wagging only twice.

"Margaret," Julianna called, straightening up. "I'll be right back."

"Okay," she called back. "I'm finishing up in your room. Don't be too long we have to get going soon."

"Okay," Julianna sighed. "I'm taking Gordy," she added as an afterthought.

Gordy bounced with excitement as they walked toward Niall's house. All Julianna felt was nervous, all over. Her hands shook and her stomach ached. This was the worst part of goodbyes.

Julianna opened the door, letting Gordy go in first. Niall was in his room, guitar strumming softly. Gordy ran into Niall's room, jumping on his bed. Julianna heard his laugh before she saw her face.

"Jules?" Niall called.

Julianna bit down on her bottom lip, breathing sharply. She slowly, walked into his room, box in hand. "Hey," she said, voice soft.

"What's that?" He asked, hands halting on Gordy's stomach.

"Some stuff I found," Julianna murmured, sitting down on the bed across from him. "While I was packing."

Niall hummed, eyes drifting back down to Gordy. He scratched at Gordy's stomach, pointedly not looking her.

Julianna cleared her throat, arms tightening around the box. "I don't want to give it back," she told him, voice cracking. Niall met her eyes. "It's selfish to keep your things. I know that. I just..."