Never Enough // NH au

2.1 in which Julianna is okay even if she isn't

warnings: angst, swearing, alcohol use, mentions/use of illicit drugs 

Julianna looked in the mirror, adjusting her hair. She pulled her lipstick out of her back pocket, sighing as she looked at it. "This is stupid," she murmured to herself.

Julianna put her lipstick on, rubbing her lips together as she looked at herself. "This is the stupidest day of my entire life," she mumbled.

A knock at the door pulled her from her thoughts. "Yeah?" She called.

"Sorry I need to piss," the voice said.

Julianna rolled her eyes, putting her lipstick back in her pocket. She swung the door open, facing the annoyance. A tall brunet with a beer in his hand. He had a stupid drunk look on his face.

The brunet pushed past her to which Julianna shoved him, eyes narrowing. "Don't fucking touch me."

"you touched me," he laughed. "Now are you going to stand there and watch me piss or are you gonna get out."

Julianna let out a groan, stomping out of the bathroom. She shook her head as she went back into the crowded living room. She didn't want to be here with all of these people who she didn't know or particularly like. The music absolutely sucked and Julianna would tell anyone that asked.

She was about to head for the door when a hand grabbed her wrist, stopping her. She spun around, eyes softening when she saw her friend, "Nina," she mumbled.

"Are you leaving?" Nina asked, eyebrows pulled together. "You just got here."

Julianna sighed, shoulders relaxing. "I'm not really feeling it tonight. I just..." she trailed off. "I don't know."

"One more drink?" Nina begged, pulling her toward the kitchen. "We can go outside and talk."

Julianna agreed because she was the kind of friend it was hard to say no to. Julianna let her pour her another whisky coke, extra strong. "Come on," Nina murmured, nodding towards the patio.

They pushed through the crowds of people. Julianna held her breath until they got outside into the warm Santa Monica air. It was a sigh of relief. There were less people standing around and most of them were smoking.

Nina and Julianna sat down on the bottom of the steps, drinks in hand. They met a few months ago when Julianna moved to Santa Monica. Feeling desperate, Julianna went to a karaoke bar alone and ended up leaving with Nina, the owner. It was the kind of friendship that was instant and easy and not at all exhausting.

"What's going on?" Nina finally asked after a moment.

"I hate it here," Julianna told her.

Her petulance made Nina laugh. She nodded, "no one loves Santa Monica. It's too close to LA but too far from San Francisco. What's really going on?"

"I miss Niall," Julianna whispered, gripping her drink a little too hard.

"Call him," Nina encouraged, leaning toward her, shoulders bumping. "It's been months since you've even seen him."

Julianna shook her head. She took a gulping sip of her drink. She let out a self-deprecating chuckle. "He made me leave."

"I can't help but root for him," Nina shrugged. "Since he's extremely hot and from what you've told me, he loved you too. What's that saying? If you love something set it free?"

"I didn't want to be set free," Julianna argued, shaking her head. Her words were heavy on her tongue. Nina made the drink extra extra strong.

"Tell him that," Nina urged, grabbing her knee. "I hate to see you sad. This is a shitty party but I know you're the type of girl to have fun. Dance on tables and shit."