Breaking Free (Smut)

Chapter 10

  Cole left after a bit and it was back to being just me alone in the house, I honestly didn't know what to do with myself. It honestly sucked being by myself it just felt like as soon as I was alone i was engulfed in sadness. Just like a big, dark blanket that was too heavy to lift. A part of wanted to reach out to Kendall but the more I thought about it made me not want to, the way things were left off was just horrible. I guess it was nice for her  to "distance" herself, but the fact she said she would try to get in the way of that. I don't know something just seems off about everything.  

 I left my thoughts alone for now and went to the kitchen and made myself some dinner, as I ate I just continued binge watching Grey's Anatomy like always. That show has honestly become my obsession at this point. I let myself drift off to sleep as I watched and prepared myself for a long rest. 

 I woke up to my phone ringing, I didn't even wanna answer. I let it go to voicemail and shut my phone off. My grief is completely consuming sometimes, but I can't let this stop me from moving on with my life. Today was the day to let go, I got up and showered and put some fresh clothes on. I even put on some makeup and did my hair. I didn't feel better yet, but I looked it. I looked like my old self, but I wasn't there yet, but as they say "Fake it till you make it", right? 

 I've been through a lot in my life, yes. However, I've never had to deal with the loss of both of my parents. I didn't know how to handle this or how I could make myself feel any better. There was only one person I knew who would understand what I was going through. I went back downstairs and turned my phone back on. 

 "Hey, it's me. Can you come over please? I need you." I spoke into the phone. 

 "Of course, I'll be over in 10." 

 And with that I hung up the phone and waited, I cooked lunch for the two of us as well. Nothing big, just grilled cheeses but that was our thing.Grilled cheese and Grey's Anatomy. And that's when I heard it. 

  Knock knock 

  "It's open!" I yelled.

  "Honey, I'm home!" I heard and the footsteps drew closer. 

  "Hey Gabe." I said as I engulfed him in a tight hug. "Sorry about what happened with Cole and everything." I said as I led him into the kitchen. 

 "It's fine, I'm not too worried about him." Gabe said with a chuckle and a wink. "What do we have here?" Gabe said as he eyed the grilled cheese waiting for him on the counter. 

 "In the mood for a little tradition?" I said smiling.

 Gabe smirked, we both took our grilled cheeses and sat on the couch. We put on Grey's Anatomy but since he'll be here for a while we decided to restart the show together. We must have watched 3 episodes before Gabe shut off the TV. He positioned himself so he was facing me, I must have known at some point he was going to want to talk about everything, but honestly I was kind of dreading it.

 "So I know you didn't just all me here saying you needed me just to watch Grey's Anatomy all day." I sighed deeply and stared at the ground,I felt tears start to swell up in my eyes. I couldn't let myself cry, I can't look weak, not anymore. I remained silent, I felt as though I couldn't even speak. 

 "Hey, you know it's okay to cry, you don't need to hide in front of me." Gabe said,I nodded and sighed deeply as he pulled me into his arms and hugged me.  "Is it about your parents?" He questioned. I released from the hugged and looked into his eyes.

 "I just don't know how to do this Gabe. They're both gone, they aren't gonna come back. I know I've had some problems with my dad, but he's gone. You know how close I was with my mother and now she's gone. I don't have anyone anymore.I just feel alone, I didn't even live with them yet I feel empty, like somethings missing." I vented to Gabe about everything, I sobbed to him. I finally finished and took a minute to catch my breath. For a minute we were both silent, Gabe trying to figure out the right thing to say.

 "Hey. You know you're not alone, I'm here. And I'm not going anywhere, you know that." Gabe said, the sympathy on his face was clear. He gently wiped the tears from my eyes and I relaxed slightly. 

 "How'd you do it?" I said, looking at Gabe in his eyes. I don't know what I was searching for in them, maybe an answer that deep down I knew didn't really exist. 

 "Truth is, I still haven't really moved on. I don't really know if you ever do, but you find ways to cope. And that's all you can ever do, I miss my parents everyday." I don't know what answer I was looking for, but that certainly wasn't it. I nodded slightly and looked down. We were both silent, I was lost in my thoughts. 

 "You know what, get up." Gabe said, rising up from the couch."I have an idea." He reached his hand out for me. I hesitated but I knew whatever this was, Gabe had a plan.

 "You wanna let me drive the Tesla?" Gabe asked, I could see the hope in his eyes. 

  "Fine. As long as you know that if you let anything happen to my baby. You will be dead." As soon as I said that Gabe knew I was serious and nodded. We hopped in the car, before we drove of I saw Cole looking through the window, he seemed pissed off but I didn't care, Gabe was the only one that could help me right now. Gabe must have noticed because he winked at me and drove off quickly. I hated that Gabe would do all that to spite him, but Cole just had to trust me right now. I know how to handle Gabe I just can't do it right now, that will be a whole different argument after I get through this. 

Author's Announcement 

Hey guys, I'm sorry this story pretty much went ghost, if anyone still wants me to update this story, please comment and let me know and I will get back to writing. I was also thinking about making another book. A more mature, grown-up one. Let me know if that's something else anyone would want to see if anyone still reads this lol. Anyways,let me know. Until next time, thank you guys!