OCEAN EYES / haruka nanase ✓

seven. melt into each other

WHAT WAS IT TO SWIM?

A question that had lingered on your mind consciously like the aftermath of a nightmare, resurfaced every now and then but was perpetually persistent thanks to your peak in interest in swimming.

Whatever you thought you knew about swimming was eradicated in the blissful presence of Haru, and in it's wake, was replaced by the ethereal mannerism of his swimming, the way he turned something you had originally perceived to be monotonous drowning into the beautiful manoeuvres reminiscent of a flower bud blossoming.

The sun is set in the sky as if fresh colours brushed upon an artist's canvas, as if those rays were destined to create a great work of art - one given to those open to capturing simple moments in the soul. A soft watermelon pink bleeds across the skies, blended most majestically with an orange gold that stretches far and wide, the colour of fire hearths and tangerines. Under this warmth, you bask in the swimming pool, where once more a swimming lesson was taking place.

This was your ninth swimming lesson and the agenda was simple; learn the art of buoyancy.

Haru looks at you momentarily, behind him is the setting sun, roaring with bright colours; the beauty blinds you. He's holding you again; his arm is wrapped around your waist, and you are hesitantly drifting with him.

"It's a wonder your skin isn't wrinkly all the time," You quietly laugh, and meet his eyes. His skin is smooth, and soft enough and pertaining a lustre that you are addicted to it. You yourself addicted to him as a whole, but was this addiction born of your lust over something attainable? Or was it the misinterpreted feelings of your undeniable love for him? Whatever it was, Haru Nanase was someone more than a friend to you.

He looks at you briefly, and the thin lips of his curves upwards ever so slightly, as if to paint a weak smile. And then he laughs lightly, breaking his constant stoic nature. You always had that power strangely, as if your words, your thoughts, yourself, could break through the emotionless barrier Haru had always put up, where it was just him and his stoic nature, beguiled by a calm posture. Just like Haru could see the real you, you could peel back the protective walls to reveal the truth of himself. That was how the intimacy between you could truly be defined. Something beyond the contemplation of the many natures of love, it was something that was born between two youths, where naivety and innocence played on the grass fields and where love blossomed like the tulip buds in spring. That was love. At least for you, in this time, there, in that swimming pool which you found yourself spending more and more time in.

You entwine your fingers with him as you think about if this was love. Were you falling in love with him? The stirring in your chest at the closeness of his body seemed to give you the answer already. Nonetheless, the anxiety that rotted the back of your mind was still searching.

"In today's lesson," He began, and you're already listening, despite the chirping of the birds in the distance and the quiet humming of the water; his voice is beyond comprehension for you. How could you feel so alive just by listening to it? Hearing him speak made you feel more loved than ever. "I'm going to teach you how to float."

You blink, turning to face him, your legs kick against the water next to his own, "So no more clinging onto you like a parasite? Figured you didn't like being attached to a shrimp." (Hope you don't mind dvtoyevsky i took that from your comment last chapter hahahaha).

He shakes his head and murmurs, "No, let me show you." Haru, like you, found himself to love your presence, if your very existence brought rejuvenating youth and timeless love into his dull world, a world where it was the water and his encompassing guilt over his past and the absence of the love he was receiving from his own parents, who were majorly abroad.

And Haru swims beneath you, making your skin crawl as you feel his touch caress it. Your legs, which normally touch the bottom of the floor to soothe your anxiety, kicked themselves to the top of the water, and you see them peek as they break the surface of the chlorinated liquid. Your body is stretched out across the water, where your skin breaks free and feels the warmth of the sun.

You look left to see Haru next you, like you, he is drifting. There's something about him, right there, right now, that makes your heart melt as your temptation to embrace him irresistible. He looks untouchable however, maybe that was just your anxiety speaking for yourself, as though you couldn't possibly get a boyfriend, you, yourself, the girl who couldn't swim, who didn't have friends, who was a nobody, couldn't and didn't deserve to fall in love.

But then you look down and see that your fingers are still entwined with each other, positing this intimacy that almost moves you to tears. You're holding hands. There's this beautiful delicate balance between you in that moment, and despite wanting to turn your body to face him as if you were both resting on a mattress and not water, you resist because you know you will break that tangible balance, and ruin everything.

"Is this... floating?" You ask quietly, again, it feel likes your mouth is clogged by something, words always are trapped in your throat. And the voice wobbles, like tears are about to be born.

Haru wistfully sighs, and pulls you closer to him from your connected hands, "Yes."

You are pulled closer to his chest, where the beating of his heart is still heard until the entanglement of you two. Within that swimming pool, on a quiet summer's day, you melt into each other, as it to become one, to redefine union. Even with the water, you can feel his heart, and it's rhythmic beating reminds you of what it is to be alive, to feel and to love, and how all of this is undeniable in this ethereal presence. Life becomes still and timeless in this moment, wherein Haru revels in his love for you, a quiet girl who seeks to learn and love, a girl whom he knew nothing of last year, whom he didn't care about but now found her the most beautiful thing in existence's entirety. And meanwhile, you, are slowly lulling yourself to sleep once more, and his heart's beating guides you to the freedom of being in water.

author's note: only 1100 words today. not really depressed today, just really stressed, anxiety is a bitch. also next chapter is the last chapter and then i'll publish an impromptu ending. enjoy!