The Ballad of Yank the Dwarf

Cable the Terrible

    "So what can you tell us about Cable the Terrible?" Yank asked Clayman. "Well for starters he's an asshole who raids our tobacco fields and steals our maidens." Clayman explained. "Wow sounds like a real douchebag." Austin chimed in. "Indeed Clayman said. "That's why me and Cujo have sworn to kick his ass, ain't that right Cujo!" Clayman yelled back as Cujo roared in response. "That's my boy!"
    It was about three hours from Sugar Hollow when they finally entered the territory of Cable the Terrible, and not even thirty minutes in when they spotted him flying overhead, each claw filled with stalks of tobacco. "His layer is to the west." Clayman said glaring at the dragon. "That's the dragon?" Yelled Yank. "He's only about the size of my horse and cart I thought Dragons were supposed to be like gargantuan sized." "Ancient ones yes, but this one just recently reached adulthood, so he isn't that big, but he's still a douchebag that needs to be taken down." Clayman explained. "Well if you know the way then by all means we'll follow you." Yank said.
    Clayman led the way to Cable's hillside cave where the entrance looked like the mouth of some demonic creature with a row of stalagmite and stalagmite teeth. "Ok so I think we should sneak in and get him while he doesn't expect us Yank whispered as Clayman prepared to yell into the cave. "Get your fat scaly ass out here and fight me you pansy ass bitch!" "Who dares disturb me in my lair," a deep and commanding voice came from the cave. "You know who this is, now get your ass out here!" Clayman shouted.
    A black horse and buggy sized dragon emerged into the mouth of the cave and said, in a less deep and commanding voice, "Oh its you again, what do you want this time?" "You know what I'm here for!" Shouted Clayman, "give me back my sister Wendy you foul fiend." "Dude how many times do I gotta tell you I didn't steal your sister?" Cable explained with a huff. "I don't wanna hear your excuses you fucking scaley, hand her over or be destroyed." Clayman said, drawing his battleaxe. "Dude its not my fault she wants this hot dragon dick, and besides I cant even if I wanted to. The evil sorcerer Christopheles took her from me, something about her making bomb ass burgers or something. I tried to stop him from taking her, but he was too powerful for me, especially since I don't have my fire breath yet."
    "Wait you're a dragon who can't breathe fire?" Yank said bewildered. "Yea bro don'tcha know, dragons don't get their breath weapon until the grow." Austin said, spitting fire bars. "Well what can you do?" Asked Yank. "I can breathe blueberry flavored smoke and fly, but thats about it." The dragon explained as he held back Clayman swinging his battleaxe frantically in vain. "This one thinks I stole His sister, when in reality she just ran away to be my wife." Cable explained. "Blasphemy!" Clayman yelled, still trying to get a hit in on Cable.
    "Clayman, come here a second." Yank said, pulling Clayman back and into a huddle. "Look even if he did take your sister, she's with Christopheles now and we could use Cable's help defeating him once and for all, then we backstab him and take back your sister." Yank explained. "Ohhh good idea." Clayman said, nodding in agreement. "Okay," Yank started, "we are actually on our way to stop Christopheles and save Princess Tanner. If you help us defeat Christopheles we will help you save Wendy." "Deal!" Cable said. "Let me it's get some tobacco for the road." And thus the party left on their most perilous adventure yet, the dreaded Bunny Forest of Doom.