SALVATION

Chapter 16

Kakashi stayed with Anko for hours on end, slowly drowning in the darkness of his mind. Fortunately no nurse had tried to throw him out yet, even though visiting hours were long over and his family had returned to their homes for the night. He figured Tsunade had told them to leave him be and Kakashi was really grateful for that. He wasn't sure what he'd do if someone tried to separate him from the woman he loved. 

Absentmindedly, he rubbed small circles on the back of Ankos' hand. 

It hurt so damn much! He hadn't known that anything could rival the pain he had felt over seeing his first world burn to the ground but it seemed as if the universe was stubborn to prove him wrong. Sighing, he put his head on Ankos' bed, closing his eyes. There were no tears left for him to shed, he had screamed his throat hoarse already and right now he felt just incredible  lost.

It was as if he had been thrown into a pitch black pit, unable to see even the smallest speck of light. He felt like a new born, like he had forgotten how to walk, like everything was pointless and he could only roll himself into a small ball, hoping and praying that everything would be over soon. 

'I can't keep going for much longer.', he suddenly realised. 'My time here has only hurt my loved ones.'

So, in the middle of pain and chaos Kakashi had made his choice.

When he opened his dark eyes again, any sign of pain or indecision was gone, instead a fire was burning brightly. 

Kakashi gazed longingly at Anko, even in sleep her face was pulled into a pained grimace and once again, he blamed himself for it. He should have never let her get so close, for her own sake. Gently, he caressed her cheek. 

"I'll put an end to this madness.", the Hatake promised her quietly. 

As if she had heard his promising words, her frown slowly perished. The next words, however, laid heavy on the time travellers' tongue but he knew he had to say them. He needed to set her free. 

"Someday Anko, someone else is going to look at you with a light in their eyes you have never seen. They will look at you like you are everything they have been looking for their entire life. They will look at you the way I do. Don't push them away because they can be the happiness you deserve."

The Hatake realised he needed to go now or he'd never be able to leave, but nobody had ever told him how much it hurt to break his own heart. 

Leaning over the purple haired kunoichi, he softly kissed her warm lips for the last time, putting everything he couldn't say into it.

A silent goodbye, an apology for the pain he caused and a promise for a better future.

Far too soon, Kakashi forced himself away.

"You'll never know just how much I love you, Anko Mitarashi."

The time traveller had to force himself every step that brought him farther and farther away from the girl he loved. He was almost outside of the room when he looked back, his eyes focusing on the single tear falling done Ankos cheek. 

With a pained expression, Kakashi left, only leaving a quiet: "I'm sorry." behind. 

Unbeknown to Kakashi, there were two shinobis who had witnessed his heartbreaking goodbye, his mother figure, Uchiha Mikoto, and his closest friend, Orochimaru.

"It's not fair.", whispered the Uchiha Matriarch, her heart breaking for the man she saw as her own son. "He safes everyone over and over again, why can't he has one happy ending?"

The Snake Sannin was uncharacteristically at a loss for words. There were simply no words that could alleviate the pain Kakashi or Anko felt. 

"Sometimes,", he stated lowly, his snake like eyes focused on the retreating form of the time traveller, "no matter how hard we try, no matter how much we want it, some stories just don't have a happy ending."