Vinnie Pov
So after school we headed to Shay's crib. We was all just chilling. Dre and Jeremiah were on the game, Shay was upstairs with Tania, mmm. Keilani and Nyema were online shopping for this summers festivities. I was just on my phone. And Vonte was being a fat ass eating the rest domino's while trying to get Gabby to talk to him. Honestly I don't know what's going on with her. She has been bitch lately and I'll tell her that. Say I won't...oh you trying me bet. "Ayo gabby !" "What pin head." She said aggressively. I scrunched my face at her. "You're a bitch, you're being a bitch, and you're acting bitchy. So stop." I said. "I will knock ya fucking teeth out right now Vinnie. Who's a bitch ?" She standing up. I smiled amused. "Come knock em out then. My hands bisexual so it's what you wanna do." I said teasing her. "You gon let him talk to me like that." She said turning to Vonte, who had a chicken wing in his mouth. He looked between us both and slowly swallowed his chicken. "Well Gabby.... you have had a stick up ya behind, BUT Vinnie, you can't be talking to her like that." He said carefully.
"You're dumb as fuck." She said to him. A few turned our heads to look at her because she was really buggin. "Yo no bull shit come here." Vonte said throwing his plate away and washing his hands, then he grabbed Gabby my her arm and dragged her outside to the back porch. I shook my head and went back on my phone. "Ight is it me or has she been wylin." Jeremiah said. "Facts." Dre agreed. "Y'all gotta check on ya friend." I said to Nyema and Keilani. They just shook their heads and went back to their online shopping. As I was scrolling through my gram, a picture of Crystal was on my timeline. I let my thumb hover over the picture, contemplating on if I should like it or not. I killed her username and opened up to her page. I was just looking through all her most recent pictures. My heart sunk with each picture. I was even more shocked when I saw that she didn't delete our pictures off her page.
I clicked on the collage she made for us on our 1 year anniversary. She used the song "I'll Kill You." By Summer Walker and Jhene Aiko. I read the caption which was a quote from the song. "I'll go to hell or jail boutchu boy." The chorus of the song kept replaying in my head. "I been waiting so long for a love like this." I mentally sighed, this ain't the love she was waiting for. I exited the gram and went to my messages and clicked ours. Our last conversation was an argument. I re-read that conversation and just thought about how fucked up I am. She doesn't deserve a love like this. She deserve better than me. I began to type, but then deleted it. I repeated those steps for about 2 minutes, trying to find the right words. I just gave up all together and put my phone on DND, locking it and tossing it to the side. I sighed as I ran my hands down my face. "You good Vinnie ? you sighing pretty hard over there." Keilani said.
"Yeah, I'm straight." I lied. Stop doing that Vinnie. "Matter fact, no. I'm not. And I need to stop lying. I'm not fine. I'm not straight. I'm not okay." I said staring out the ceiling. I heard the game pause, and the computers close, I felt everyone move closer to me but my eyes remained on the ceiling. Not once did I sit up from my laying down position. "What's wrong Vinnie." Nyema asked. "My life has been crumbling for years and it took me until I was 18 to finally reach my breaking point. I'm Vinnie, I'm the happy, goofy, stupid, slow one. If y'all need to laugh, I'm the guy, y'all need the mood lifted, I'm the guy. Anything positive, I'm your man. It's all cap. I'm not happy, I'm not positive. I'm suffering yo. In the same day I lost my girl friend and my brother, hell I lost myself. Although losing Vonte was my fault because I cut him off. I felt he wasn't there for me and it's true, he wasn't. At the same time though I didn't allow him. Now he's trying to make it up to mr and be the big brother I needed him to be but I'm just mad, I don't wanna let that hurt go. I been going through some things man and I just need help." I said as I let tears fall freely.
"In all our years of friendship Vinnie, I have never seen you cry. I've never seen you hurt, I've never seen you down. I feel like a dick head because I never noticed either. I mean we bros and I never knew how much you were going through it." Dre said. "Why you ain't never told us." Jeremiah said. "I didn't want to be nobodies problem. I'd rather suffer alone before I accept somebodies pity." I spoke. "Vinnie you our family. If we love you, we love you. We want to be there for you out of love and genuine support, not pity. We all go through things, and I mean we ALL. But we got each other for a reason. I don't know where I'd be with out y'all." Nyema spoke. "I took a life bro, but guess who got me through that, y'all." Jeremiah spoke. "I almost took my life, guess who got me through that, y'all." Nyema spoke. "I lost my brother, the same brother I was being abused by, and guess who got me through that... yup, y'all." Keilani said. "Moral of the story bro, we all got fucked up lives, we all are there to make it better and ease the pain. I can't say i've been through things nearly as bad as y'all but hell I know pain. Trust me when I said dat. But no matter what I go through I got y'all." Dre said.
