So Near, Yet so Far (COMPLETED)

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Chapter 13

It was the first time Sir Saavedra called her by her first name. And the way he said it. Parang close sila sa isa't-isa, parang hindi siya nito estudyante lang. Gusto niyang ipaulit dito ito. She wanted to hear him spoke her name again.

And that unfamiliar look on his face. She expected his usual stern face but this time he looked so concerned and hurt. She'd seen that look from her brother when she was once all attention to her computer and would totall ignoring him by uttering 'okay' to everything he would say. 

"You're showing me too much of yourself right now, Coleen," sabi nito na hindi niya naintindihan, "and I don't know how to handle that."

"Sir..."

It was Sir Saavedra who's supposed to be lost at her sudden appearance in the parking but it was her who was dumbfounded at what he's saying. Akala niya sesermunan lang siya nito.

Si Sir Saavedra ba ang kaharap niya ngayon?

"I couldn't guess why you're crying like that, Coleen," sabi nito at biglang nagdilim ang mukha, "pero huwag mong sabihing may nanakit sa 'yong isang gago, please, I might just kill him without hesitation."

She stared at him with wide eyes. Tama ba ang mga naririnig niya rito?

"Sir..." bulong niya.

Hindi niya alam kung anong sasabihin. Naguguluhan siya sa inaasal nito.

She suddenly realized that her face might be covered in tears and snots, becoming cautious in an instant. Mabilis na pinunas niya ang mukha saka suminghot bago ibinalik ang mga mata rito.

"I'll drive you home," sabi nito saka umikot sa kabilang pintuan. Pinagbuksan siya nito. "Get in."

Desperation still on her veins, she managed to walk to his car. Instead of entering at the opened door, she went for the door at the back seat and opened it herself.

Sir Saavedra watched her with questioning look. Sayang lang ang pagbubukas nito ng pinto para sa kanya. With her already inside the car, he just nodded it off, hiding a smirk as he closed the door.

Nobody spoke as the car moved.

Medyo kalmado na siya ng kaunti pero paminsan-minsa'y naiiyak kapag nakikita niya ang posibilidad na magkatuluyan sila Sir Saavedra at Ms. Delos Santos.

After fifteen minutes, Sir Saavedra asked, "Pwede mo na bang ipaliwanag sa akin kung anong nangyari?"

Her eyes never left him. The fact that she was riding his car and watching him drive was a surreal moment. Parang sila lang dalawa ang nasa highway. Parang espesyal na pinagawa ang kalsadang iyon para sa moment nilang iyon. Tuloy nawala ang panghihinayang niya sa laki ng tax na kanyang binabayaran.

"Nothing happened," sabi niya nang nahihiya saka nagbaba ng tingin.

"O-kay," sagot nito sa di kumbinsidong tono. "But you're crying and that's because..."

Tikom ang bibig niya. She thought that she could easily blurt it out but she was scared to know his reply. Sa confession lang niya hinanda ang sarili hindi sa rejection.

"Evangelista?" tawag nito sa kanya.

It caught her. Just earlier he was calling her Coleen; now he's back to being her professor again.

Parang ayaw na tuloy niyang umamin dito. Ayaw niyang igising siya nito sa katotohanan. Katotohanan na isa lamang siya nitong estudyante.

She squeezed her fists tightly. "Sir, si Ms. Delos Santos..."

"Si Kristine!" sabi nito at kinagat niya ang labi sa inis. There was a sudden cheer in his voice as he spoke the name. "I've known her since highschool. Naging kapitbahay namin sila noong lumipat kami. And then we became college classmates..."

Masayang nagkuwento ito tungkol kay Ms. Delos Santos habang siya ay nagtitimping nakinig dito. Gusto niyang pigilan ito pero parang ito ang walang balak magpapigil at di maubusan ng ikukwento.

"Sir," putol niya dito nang hindi na niya matiis at ingat na ingat siya na hindi pumiyok. She tried to speak calmly, "Huwag po kayong pumunta sa dinner ng mga Delos Santos."

He didn't reply and just continued driving. Ni hindi man lang ito nagtanong kung saan niya nalaman ang tungkol doon.

Ayaw niya nang ganoong katahimikan. Gusto niyang ipabukas ang bintana para kahit papano'y may ingay siyang marinig mula sa mga kasabay nilang sasakyan. Oo, kung kanina pakiramdam niya silang dalawa lang ang nasa kalsada ngayon ay nasa labas ang kanyang atensyon, tinatanong ang sarili kung bakit siya naroon. Hindi siya dapat naroon.

A decade of silence followed. Marahil ang katahimikan ni Sir Saavedra ay katumbas ng "it's none of your business" at wala lang itong lakas na sabihin sa kanya. Pero kasi. Pero kasi, gusto niyang subukan.

"Sir, please," she said the last minute, drowning in desperation, "don't go...Please, Sir."

Kung pagsisisihan man niya ang mga sinabi niya o pagagalitan ang sarili na nagpadala siya sa damdamin, bahala na. Nang mga oras na iyon gusto niyang maging makasarili. Gusto niyang ipilit dito na siya ang mahalin. Gusto niyang siya dapat.

Nanginginig ang mga labing inusal niya, "Please, ayoko...si Ms. Delos Santos...ayoko...please..."

"Coleen," sabi nito at para siyang nabingi sa sunod nitong sinabi, "I'm sorry."

---End of Chapter---

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