Six Turns Into One

Decay

Warning: suicide, overdose, depressive thoughts..

It had been awhile since Jane left them. Nothing was the same since. Has it ever been the same since they lost Katherine? No. It hasn't. No matter how hard they tried, they ended up losing someone. They lost four friends, and it was painful.

Anne and Catherine remain, although they didn't speak to each other that much. The trauma they experienced was too much to handle. They watched their friends die, they watched as they all withered away from them. Maybe none of this wouldn't have happened if they notice what was going on with Katherine, and perhaps they could've found a way to prevent Aragon's death. There could've been some way to prevent everyone's death.

Anne locked herself in her room a lot, often spending everyday in her bed crying. Parr hated the silence, she missed the times when there'd be laughter resonating in the household. She missed the times there'd be someone shouting, as annoying as it was, she didn't mind too much.

Anne used to love the silence, actually. Despite her being the reason why there's rarely any silence, she loved it. Especially at night, she could focus on doing what she likes. But now, silence is something she fears. She hated it. She wanted to hear Katherine's voice again, she wanted to taste Jane's food again, she wanted to hear Anna's annoying jokes again, she wanted to hear Aragon's annoying scolding.

She missed them all so much. She missed everything about her friends. Anne wanted to see them again. She wanted to smile again, she wanted to sing and dance with everyone. Anne wanted to go out and venture the world with everyone. But it was impossible. Simply impossible.

She wished to see everyone again so badly, and this pain in her chest was starting to become too much. Anne was getting tired everyday, tired of being alive in general. Anne was only surprised to see that she was still breathing. She hated the fact that she was still breathing. Anne hated knowing that she was okay and living, when she watched all her friends die. She didn't deserve to be alive.

Everyone else deserved to have a life, but they were taken too soon. Anne missed everyone. Catherine did too. Everyday seemed harder than before, Anne had to cook more for Catherine, as Catherine was inexperienced with cooking. She had to go out a lot and leave Catherine alone at home, but she hated leaving Catherine alone, because she feared that when she came back, she'd be gone too.

Anne was slowly losing herself. She was losing all her reasons to live. She didn't know what to do with her life anymore. All the trauma she experienced kept replaying over and over in her mind until she couldn't take it anymore. It'd keep replaying until she curled up into a ball and sobbed for hours straight, she'd pull at her hair, bite her fingernails and do other nasty habits she didn't know she'd develop. She just wanted to forget all the things that happened.

She just wanted to forget about everyone. Anne hated this pain so much. She wished she was dead too. Anne didn't want to keep feeling this pain over losing her friends. What she hated most is when Katherine and Jane left. They were her cousins, they've been the closest trio since they were born. Anne wanted to be with them, she wanted to be with Aragon too, she wanted to be with Anna and hear her voice as well.

Anne wished she could forget about everyone, but she can't. Because she loves them too much to let them go. She wasn't ready to say goodbye to them, never.

Alas, she found a bottle of pills. Anne knew she'd regret doing this, knowing she was gonna leave Cathy behind. But what could she do? She couldn't keep doing this forever. Acting as a mother figure towards Catherine, only Aragon could keep that up, and yet she left too. What difference does it make if she does too? She couldn't take care of Cathy, yes she was old enough to live by herself, but she was never capable of doing anything else without them. Anne only kept going for Cathy, but now the pain that was in her chest was too much to handle.