the outsider

'𝑚𝑒𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑠'

𝑓𝑖𝑣𝑒 : 𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑖𝑒
"what no thank you?" taylor smirks with a sarcastic tone to match.
"i don't say thank you" i inform him, popping the door open.
"that's kinda rude" he calls after me as i close the door behind me as quietly as possible.
i wasn't sure where my father was, but if he was home, i know he wouldn't like this.
"i kinda don't care" i call back, giving him the finger. he then proceeds to pull off of the curb, shaking his head lightly, a small smile upturning then corners of his mouth.
i had to give it to him, he was attractive. especially when he smiled.
i was brought back into reality by the scattered glass surrounding the shoe rack. i could've sworn i cleaned this up this morning, just like I do every morning.
i slip my shoes off quietly, making my way to the stairs slow and steadily.
"julianna?" a slurred voice called from behind me, stopping me in my tracks. i take one last desperate attempt at proceeding up the stairs.
"julianna, i'm talking to you!"
it's too late. he's noticed me.
"yes, father?" i say, turning to face him.
his mouth was pressed in a hard line, the strong haunting smell of liquor still managing to escape. his barely eyes met mine, the dark circles beneath almost pulling his glare down to his stubble that masked his chin.
"did i hear a car drop you off today?" he asks, a blank stare reaching me.
some people would be surprised that he was even breathing, based off of his physical appearance.
i barely recognise him, at this point.
the worst part was, i still have the memories. the memories of him and my mother dancing around the kitchen with smiles so wide, you'd think their cheeks were about to fall off. he was a happy man.
it's true what they say about love, it either completes you, or wrecks you.
and for my father, well it goes without saying, it wrecked him.
"who was that i saw dropping you off?" he barked in my face.
i don't move. i know that's a bad move.
"who was it?"
i ignore the sound of my heart beginning to thumb. play dumb. always play dumb.
"when?"
"just now. it looked like a boy to me" his spits, somehow finding a way to force his face closer to mine.
his mouth twisted upward in an unsettling way before he laughs, sinisterly.
"who am i kidding? what boy would like a slut like you" he hissed. i just take a deep breath, not daring to respond.
i didn't respect my father. i didn't respect anyone, but i knew better than to try reasoning with an aggressive drunk.
"can you not even answer me? stupid girl! answer me!"
if that had been anyone else, they'd receive a middle finger in return, however i'm well aware what that would earn me.
"i'm sorry" i spit, immediately regretting my choice of tone.
he strikes his hand sharply across my cheek, leaving a stinging sensation.
my father rarely laid hands on us, however, on the rare occasion he did, it was me. it was always me. that's not surprising though, considering caleb was the perfect child and hayley was a double of our mother, meaning he wouldn't even consider it.
"how dare you talk to me like that?" he growls, gripping onto my forearm. i realise tonight was going to be one of the worse nights and attempt to squirm from his grip.
"you're worthless, you know that?"
it's no use. he has too tight of a grip and i'm trapped.
he slams my body back, hitting the wall with force. i fight off the whine threatening to escape my mouth.
"who let you think it was okay to talk to me like that?" he snarls, forcing his knee to meet my stomach, sending a shooting pain through my gut.
"silly, silly girl" father shouted, spit landing across my face before his hand sharply met my cheek again. i refuse to cry or whine, either of those things result in much worse than a slap.