the outsider

'𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑖 𝑙𝑢𝑐𝑘𝑦?'

ℎ𝑎𝑦𝑑𝑒𝑛 : 𝑡𝑤𝑒𝑙𝑣𝑒
don't get me wrong, caleb was still holding a grudge against me, but thankfully, after a football win, some of the other boys managed to persuade him to let me tag along to the after party.
i'd learnt that attaway sat in a painfully mediocre category for sports, in particular, football. they had a few good individuals, but hadn't quite found their rhythm as a team yet. this meant that games were usually a fifty-fifty, making a win an immediate call for celebration.
the party wasn't for a few hours, so naturally, i headed home to pass the time.
i fling the door open, setting my school bag down before being stopped by the sound of my father's voice. i follow the sound of his voice to kitchen.
"for god's sake, don't pull hayden into this!" he shouted, his phone covering his right ear with his back turned to me. i pause, hovering at the door, intrigued.
"let the kid live! we've already ruined enough for him! why are you so determined to ruin his life?" he hisses, with an unfamiliar hint of venom in his voice.
"i don't care what happened between us, tisha, he's still our son and this isn't fair. that money is HIS and not-" he pauses, as the door creaks and i'm forced to step forward.
"i can't talk to you about this right now" he tells, presumably my mother, hanging up. his facial expressions soften instantly as he sets his phone down.
i step further forward into the kitchen, pretending as if i hadn't just witnessed another argument between my parents.
my father does the same, offering me a clearly fake, yet wide smile.
"how was the game?" he asks as i reach for an apple sitting in the fruit bowl.
i shrug. sports are never as fun when you're watching and not playing.
"caleb still not letting you play?"
my dad and i have always been close, him, my brother and i. i hadn't told my dad the full story on why caleb kicked me off the team because honestly, it's all a bit pathetic and it involves telling him i'd skipped class, with a girl. call him stereotypical, but if he heard i'd skipped class and taken a girl home, no matter what i claimed we'd done, he wouldn't believe me and probably would understand where caleb was coming from. instead, I told him caleb had just taken a dislike to me for whatever reason and he'd bought it.
i shake my head.
"i reckon next week"
"hopefully" he nods in agreement.
normally, after overhearing one of my parent's arguments, i brush off everything i hear but what i'd heard today was sticking to me.
'𝙝𝙚'𝙨 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙨𝙤𝙣, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙞𝙨𝙣'𝙩 𝙛𝙖𝙞𝙧. 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙮 𝙞𝙨 𝙃𝙄𝙎 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨-'
of all the arguments they'd had, i'd never heard one about money. when they divorced, they just split everything, apart from me of course, as it's the easiest option. so what money were they talking about? what money did they share anymore?
i catch him heading towards the door and my curiosity gets the best of me.
"what money were you and mom fighting about?" i blurt out, instantly regretting it as i hear him audibly sigh.
"it's nothing hayden, leave it" he says, continuing to edge towards the door before I stop him again.
"it didn't sound like nothing"
"i'm only going to tell you once, leave it. it's between your mom and i" he warns, slipping out and leaving me with one option, to get ready for the party.
[...]
attaway's parties were no different from the one's at my old school, they'd start at ten and within thirty minutes, most people were swaying and slurring.
i wasn't much of a drinker before i swore off it, making staying sober less of a task. i was also aware that i'd previously agreed to drive a few guys home, meaning i was in no position to risk it.
"summerall!" caleb calls, heading towards me with a beer in hand.
"hey man, great game today" i say, feeling like a suck up. i didn't have much of the choice though. although caleb's anger had slowly been easing out on me over the past two weeks, there was an evident grudge hanging between us and he had the power to keep me off of the team for however long he feels like it.
"thank you. i noticed you haven't touched the drink" he says, nodding towards the table that had been stacked with alcohol in the far corner.
"yeah, i don't drink" i shrug.
he takes a sip from his beer, narrowing his eyes slightly at me.
"i'm gonna cut to the point, a few guys on the team want me to let you back on for next week and well, i guess i gotta do what's best for the team"
a smile finds it way across my lips, pulling each corner wide.
"seriously?"
caleb nods.
"however, my sister and i are still in a bit of a patchy place and i just wanted to say i was sorry. what happened was between her and i, and i guess i just took it out on you" he admits.
i have no idea why what happened pissed hayden off so much, but it's clear there's history there and i wasn't planning to touch on it.
"don't worry about it. these things happen" i assure him.
"anyways, i'm gonna get back to the party" he says. i nod, telling him I'm glad we're cool before he disappears into the crowd.
i think about how easy that was, we fixed two weeks of awkwardness in a two minutes conversation.
i'd yet to do that with gracie.
i hadn't spoken to her since that day at my house, where she made it clear we weren't friends anymore, or ever, really.
the only interaction i'd managed to have with her since was through our brief passings in the halls. even when i attempted to talk to her, she ignored me with ease.
i'd be lying if i said it didn't piss me off. i'd been  nice to her from the moment we met, but yet, she shoved it back in my face. i'd accepted that over the years, some people were just like this but it was different with her.
she wasn't just ignorant because that's the type of person she was, there was something else, something behind it.
i'd guessed that the day we spent at my house, the day she let her guard drop. not by much, but a little. she let herself smile when i was failing marvellously, and let me tell you, it was the most beautiful one i've ever seen.
i wondered how many people she'd smiled like that for, wether i was lucky or not to have seen that side of her. that smile that remains ingrained in my mind.
watching everyone else party on, i reach a decision. i 𝙝𝙖𝙙 to be lucky to see a smile like hers.