Unarmed

Chapter 33

Authors note, 5/26/2020, 1:36am: I've suddenly become very obsessed with the story so I'm cranking out these chapters, ahaha. Enjoy the latest update!
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Chantelle's POV

Hey.

Lucas' text comes exactly a week later. It's Sunday afternoon and I've just finished meal prepping for the week. I close my refrigerator then sit down on my couch and text him back.

Hey Lucas. How are you?

I'm nervous texting him.

Im okay. You free to meet for coffee this afternoon?

Yeah I text back. What time did you wanna meet?

Let's do 2pm? At Philz on Market Street

It's 1pm. That gives me 40 minutes to get ready and another 20 minutes to walk to Philz.

See you then 

I hit send then scramble to get ready. My outfit of choice is one that's simple but also somewhat sexy. I really want Lucas back and have to bring my whole package to the table.

It's November in San Francisco, which means the sun is shining but it's a bit chilly outside. I decide on simple black Lulu leggings with a cropped, knit maroon sweater. I take my hair out of their twists and style them with a bit of mousse. Lucas always loved when I would wear my natural hair out.

I head to the bathroom to brush my teeth and put on a bit of makeup. I think about putting on a full face but decide that's way too much for coffee. Instead I put on eyeliner, mascara and some lip gloss. It's simple but cute.

I glance at my watch and it's 1:40. I gotta go. I pull on some black flats, grab my purse then head out the door.

When I get to the coffee shop, Lucas is sitting in one of the corners in a green armchair. He's wearing an olive green bomber jacket and jeans. I do have to say that I love that color on him.

"Hey," I say, walking up to him.

"Hey," he says. I notice that he stays seated and have to remind myself that it makes sense. We're practically strangers once again. I take a seat in the chair across from him. There's a small, round coffee table between us.

"Do you want anything?" he asks. "I was gonna order a Philtered Soul."

"Um..." I glance at the menu quickly. "I'll get a Gingersnap Iced Coffee." I dig through my purse and grab my wallet.

"Don't worry about it," Lucas says, standing up. "Sweet and creamy as usual?"

"Yeah, please." I say. "And thank you."

Lucas simply nods as he walks towards the counter to place our order.

I twiddle my thumbs as I wait for him to return. I'm so, so nervous. I'm afraid he's gonna end it once and for all. I'm afraid that this is it. My expectations are low and yet I'm so thankful he's given me, thankful he's given us, this opportunity.

"Here you go," Lucas says, handing me my coffee. I take a sip and it's delicious.

"Thanks," I say again.

"No worries."

It's an awkward couple of minutes as we sip our coffees and look anywhere but at each other. Lucas invited me so I want to let him lead the conversation.

"Okay," Lucas finally says. "I'm going to be super transparent with you cause I feel like I owe you that. And I feel like I said most of what I wanted to say to you at the farmer's market last week. But what I didn't say is that I still love you too. That hasn't changed."

My heart flutters a bit but I know to contain my excitement. This is just the tip of the iceberg.

"I... I feel like we're meant to be together," Lucas continues. "There's been too many coincidences for us not to be together. From the parking ticket, to living in the same complex, to Cosmo offering you a job in the same city I chose to relocate to. Us meeting at one of the dozens of farmers markets in SF. It's too damn coincidental for me to ignore."

I nod my head slowly. I hadn't thought about all that but he's 100% right. Our paths keep crossing.

"But, at the same time, that doesn't invalidate my feelings and what you put me through. I have to work through that. And I don't know how to be honest."

"What about couple's therapy?" The thought comes out of my mouth as soon as it comes into my mind.

Lucas raises his eyebrows. "Couples therapy?" He draws out the word couples and I know I've spoken too soon. "We're very far from a couple at this point Chantelle."

"No, yeah, you're right. I just... blurted out the first thing that came to mind."

"I do like the idea of therapy though," Lucas says. He takes a sip of his coffee then puts it back down on the coffee table. "That would probably be helpful in working through the shooting too."

"Yeah..." I say, my voice trailing off. As much as I would love to do couple's therapy with Lucas, what he said is true. He needs to work through his own feelings and the shooting before considering me.

"I'm guarded Chantelle, " Lucas sighs. I can see that he's starting to be a bit vulnerable but he's still on the defense. "As much as I think the universe wants us to be together, who's to say you won't hurt me again? You've done it once and I have no reason to believe you won't do it again."

It hurts. Those words cut super deep. But I also know the reason it hurts is because it's true. I've created a track record in this relationship and it's not a good one.

"You're right." I say. I sigh then focus on the ground. It's at least a minute before I speak again.

"I haven't given you much to be confident in. But like I told you last week, I'm so, so sorry. I recognize how wrong I was. And while Cosmo did give me that offer to move down here, part of the reason I took it is because deep down, I knew you were down here. I wanted a second chance. A chance to show you a better version of myself. A version of myself that you rightfully deserve. I want to make things right Lucas."

We're both getting emotional and take a few moments to gather ourselves.

"I'm open to a second chance. I really am. But it's gonna be a marathon, Chantelle. Not a sprint. You've reopened some wounds and we're gonna have to work though that. I'm definitely going to look into therapy too."

I smile a bit. "So... we're gonna try again?"

"Yeah," Lucas says. "You're just going to need to be patient with me."

"I can do that." On the inside, I'm giddy. I'm happy Lucas wants to try again. But there's a bit of solemnity too. It's going to be a lot of hard work.

But I also know it's going to be worth it.