Overdue - A Rockstar Romance

Chapter 38 - Phoebe

I have no right to hate him for the girl's all over him. No real claim to him beyond the fact we said we were seeing each other. We aren't together. We aren't exclusive. Seeing his hands on that girl as I sat at my Nanna's bedside, I just saw red.

Now, sat in a booth at a quiet little Wetherspoon's and waiting for him I'm calmer than I was. There's something oddly comforting about knowing my Nanna is safe in hospital right now. Most of the time I'm on edge about trying to get back for her. I feel the guilt course through me at the thought. How could I feel happy she is lying in a hospital bed right now?

Granted, she seemed happier than I've seen her in a long while when I left her. She was chatting about some presenter her and the elderly woman in the bed next to her both liked. Their cackles of laughter followed me out into the corridor.

Maybe Elliott had a point?

"Hey." A soft voice interupts my thoughts and I look up sharply.

Elliott is stood, looking perfect as ever. A baseball cap hiding his face as much as possible.

"Hi." I reply shyly.

"This seat taken?" His mouth twists into a smile.

I shake my head, unable to help my responding smile.

We sit there and stare at each other for a moment. Time has defused most of my initial anger but I feel that jealousy still there.

"I'm sorry Phoebe." He starts and I jump at how loud his voice is compared to the quiet.

I think about interrupting, telling him it's OK. But it's not and I want to hear him explain it.

"She came at me, surprised me. I had no idea she had a camera, or even took photos. If I had known I would have warned you." He started earnestly and I felt my face fall.

'So don't tell me you're sorry 'cause you're not. Baby when I know you're only sorry you got caught.' The half remembered lyrics drifting through my brain feel oddly relevant to my situation.

"So you're sorry I had to see pictures of it? Not that you had your hands on another girl?" I say softly.

He frowns, "Don't twist my words, I didn't want to touch her, I was moving away."

"So you say." I murmur, the words slipping out before I can stop them.

"I thought you were going to hear me out." He snaps back and I snort.

"I'm listening. Just can't help but wonder if you would have even told me if those photos hadn't leaked."

I watch his expression and see the guilt. He wasn't going to tell me. My wild accusation not so wild afterall.

"I don't even want to talk about it anymore, I know I don't have any right to tell you what to do or any claim to you." I stand to leave and he catches my arm.

"What the fuck Pheebs. Where do you think you're going? I'm trying to talk to you." Elliott snaps back and I flinch.

I wasn't great at dealing with confrontation at the best of times, even ones I had clearly started.

"What is there to say?" I throw back, pushing his hand off my arm.

"A lot." He spat back, visibly trying to calm himself at my expression, "Let's talk about this thing between us. How do I know what you're feeling if you constantly running from me. What if I want you to have a claim over me? Did you ever think it might be worth talking to me about what we are, what we could be?"

He swipes an angry hand through his already messy hair, frustration and hurt warring on his face. Then with warning he leans over the table and pulls me to him. My heart pounds and his lips crush against mine.

The kiss isn't the end of our fight but more of a continuation. He attempts to silence my fury with his own and for a moment I forget why I'm so angry and what triggered this moment. I melt under him, the heat of our kiss burning through me with an almost frightening intensity. Then my hands are on his shoulders and I push, ripping my lips from his and gasping for air.

"What was that?" I whisper, falling back in the seat.

"That was me showing you how I feel seeing as telling you doesn't seem to be getting through." He replies, as breathless as me.

"I need-" I start, struggling to find the words in my kiss-addled brain.

"What? I will literally do anything for you to give me a damn chance." He sounds angry and part of me doesn't blame him.

I can see he's trying and I do believe him about what happened the day before.

But another part of me is whispering that we still don't know him. My heart aches at the thought of him breaking the small part of it that is already his.

"I need some time and a bit of space. This was a mistake coming tonight." I whisper and when I stand this time, he doesn't try to stop me.

I can see the hurt in his eyes as he stands quickly alongside me. "So we are done?" He asks.

I shake my head, "No, I just need a bit of time to process how I'm going to handle this seeing as I don't think this is going to be the only time it happens. Do you?"

He shakes his head, "Just don't give up on us Phoebe." Comes his broken response.

I hesitate, thinking about hugging him goodbye but deciding against it.

"I'll message you later." And then before his sad eyes can change my mind I make for the door.

Don't look back, I order myself but as I step through the door I can't resist a small look. He meets my eyes and then turns and heads for the bar as I make my way home.