DAWNING POINT (AgeTabooRomance)

Chapter 12

Weeks went by and I'd barely seen Manning, neither at The Harbour nor at Kallum's house, or anywhere in between for that matter.

To my knowledge he was still living out of the Adams' household, but for the most part didn't stick around long enough to make conversation. It appeared the only exception to the rule was Mary, in which I'd heard he had taken full advantage of her cooking leftovers in between running ceaseless errands, but apart from that, it was like the man had become something of a ghost.

When Manning had initially arrived in Dawning Point he was only supposed to be staying with Kall and Andrew for a few weeks, that period having ended over a month ago, but now that he had a business here – planned venture or otherwise – I assumed his sudden absence had something to do with additional work ventures or maybe his searching for a permanent residence somewhere in town.

Of course, I was only drawing conclusions; Kallum had hardly discussed his uncle with me and I certainly didn't ask any unnecessary questions. One of the only times Manning had come up between us was five weeks ago when the news broke that he had taken ownership of The Harbour, and Kallum had offered his assistance with my new boss in the case that I should ever need it. Beyond that, the topic of his uncle was kept strictly minimal, Kall's evident distaste for him as thick and as potent as it had ever been, residual from long before Manning showed up here.

And as awful as it was to admit, I was relieved.

I knew it was selfish of me to feel that way. I ought to have been more empathetic to Kallum's feelings instead of dwelling on my own like I had been. It wasn't as though Manning was bound to me through blood like he was to Kallum, which made Kall's pain all the worse and understandably so. Manning was Kallum's only uncle, his only extended blood family because his mother didn't have any siblings or parents and Andrew only had one brother with his father deceased. Manning was Kall's only family relationship to grow beyond his own father, and yet somehow it seemed since the moment I saw Manning for the first time that I'd been blind to these foremost details. Blind to the unresolved disappointment that that man had instilled in Kallum long before I was so much as a thought in mind, having carelessly discarded of the chance to build a connection with his own nephew.

And there I was, drowning in my own pathetic self-concern having forgotten Kallum's place in all this.

Fuck. Me. Dead.

What made it all the worse was that I'd become conscious of my cowardice and yet I'd still been avoiding Kallum's house as much as I possibly could, convincing him to come out for coffee dates at Delilah's or drives along the coast instead.

If he had deduced a reason for my excuses he hadn't said so, but knowing Kall he'd have assumed my reasons were warranted, which made me all the less deserving of him right now.

Kallum was always amazing that way; whenever and wherever he could, he made things easier for me. He held my hand, held his judgement, waited for me to share and let him in at my own pace, never forcing truths out of me and openly sharing his own.

But the truth was – what my truth was – I couldn't stomach his uncle.

Some truths don't need to be shared, the little voice in my head interjected but I wasn't sure whether it was reason talking or something else, and although that voice wasn't exactly wrong, it failed to make me feel any better.

In reality nothing untoward had happened between Manning and I but the guilt lingered anyway, just like his presence in my life – the purely professional nature of our practically non-existent relationship, as separate from Kallum's family ties – and it was impacting Kall and my friendship. I'd been allowing it to impact our relationship, creating a division between us that wasn't formed of our shortcomings but purely my own, and then treating such as if it wasn't something I could fix or change.