Bad Together

• | 19 | • Sexual

SONG | Sexual ~ NEIKED, Dyo

I don't know what you've done
But I can't get enough

'Cause you give me that rush
I don't want it to stop

✰✰☀︎✰✰

Rosalie Jenkins

I had many habits, Some I found quite annoying and the others I found good. All my life I have felt like I have been running around in circles. Quite literally.

Last night I told a stranger something that had been on my mind for quite some time now. I don't know why I did that. Was it because I felt comfortable with him? It can't of been because I wanted to because it's not a decision I would make.

Sadly I will never know. I was high off my mind when I said some of those things. And now that I am sober I can't recall any of the things I might have said or thought about in the last 24 hours.

I kept telling myself that it was the right thing to do. I needed to open up. My whole life I have been keeping myself from doing all the fun things in life. Maybe it was the people who I associated with that kept me isolated from those things.

Growing up, I didn't have anyone to talk to about any of my issues. Wether or not they were important, I had to keep it all to myself.

And I now know that over time it has been killing me inside to keep all those things a secret. I hated the fact that I couldn't gather up the courage to tell my mom something was wrong.

She is a busy woman.

Finding excuses for all my actions was a habit I hated. There was always two sides to a story.

A story I knew I could never tell was about a man I ran into a couple weeks ago. A man that changed my whole life in just a matter of seconds. A man that I can't run away from.

I took a step into the maze, not knowing where it would lead me. It was scary, it was very dark and I could barely see what was in front of me.

The dense grainy fog that layered down by my feet made me feel like I was being pulled down into the ground. I felt something wrap around my feet, luring me down a path that had many turnings.

I had no time for intellectual stimulation whilst time was running out.

Then there was him.

He was one thing I wasn't sure of. He hadn't hurt me yet so there was that eternal gratitude I felt for him saving my life last night.

I could tell he was trying his best not to get me killed. His eyes gave it all away. Today they were ashy gray, reminding me of a hazy winters morning, not a sunny day, but a cold one. I could see the guilt in his irises, even if he tried to disguise it. I could see what he couldn't do.

We all wear masks to cover up.

I wasn't sure about him yet because I didn't want to admit that I felt an attraction towards him. it's impossible to say that there wasn't any chemistry between us. It's literally right there.