Winchester or Angel?

5. Miss You

For a moment, I soaked in the attention, the applause.

In the next moment, I was reminded of the last time I had been up here.

I used to come and sing duets with Erin, but the last time I ever did was a month ago. We stopped because she had lost her nerve, until now I had no clue as to why she would give up such a thing which we both cherished.

The instant I realized I could never be here with her again, I ran off the stage. As fast as my legs would take me, I ran to the back door leading to the alley.

After I reached the alley, I couldn't take another step so I just fell down to my knees. Bursting into tears, I clung onto every memory I had of the most amazing woman I ever had the fortune of knowing. I've known her so long, I don't even remember who I was before we met.

Dean then rushed out from the door, looking around the alley until his eyes landed on me.

He knelt, then sat down close and put his arms around me, pulling me into his lap. I surrendered, resting my head on his shoulder, letting him brush my hair away and rub my back.

"Why?" I ask, still crying over the loss of someone so dear to me. "Why is she gone? Why her?"

Dean is silent for a moment, and I can tell he is withholding information.

"It was her time."

"Why now?" I continue to question, beginning to feel anger. "Why would God allow such a thing to happen?"

"I'm pretty sure 'God' had nothing to do with it sweetheart."

"What? What do you mean? What was that thing that attacked me this afternoon? Who did you kill when Castiel took me to Paris? Did dogs really attack Erin? Why? Are you Dean from the Supernatural books?"

"Woah, woah, when did this become an interrogation?" Dean asked, with me still in his lap, but no longer rubbing my back. "Shhh, come on, let's get you back. We'll go to the motel, get you cleaned up, and you can watch some TV, whatdoya say?"

"Alright..."

~*~*~

After Dean brought me back to the motel, he helped me calm down and get all my makeup off. I then changed (by myself) into the loungewear I brought with me in the duffel bag.

Now we're watching Doctor Who, the episode where the master comes back from the dead.

David Tennant, my Doctor, (Spoiler alert) dies, and I am set off crying over Erin again.

Dean freaks out a bit this time, turns off the TV, and goes into the kitchen area.

Through my sobs, I hear him dial on his cell phone, then talk to whoever probably answered the phone. I try to eavesdrop on the conversation, but Dean is speaking so quietly, it's a little hard to make out what he's saying.

I know, Sammy. I'm sorry, I just - I -

Oh, Sammy come on! I need you.

Please.

But this one's different.

Yes, it is.

How? Well, she's being targeted that's how. And get this, she's being targeted by different types of monsters.

I have no idea.

She seems pretty damn ordinary. Not too tough on the eyes, either.

No, I'm not -

Oh, come on Sammy! She's freaking out! You know I'm no good with chick flick moments.

Sammy!

You know what? Even Cas was getting some weird vibes off of this one.

I'll have you home by the end of winter break.

I know Christmas is in a couple days, but it's not like you have any other family, or a girlfriend to spend it with.

Oh you do have a girlfriend?

Well of course a first year college student would want to spend Christmas with her family!

I'll see you soon.

Dean stops talking, and it seems like he must have hung up.

"Hey, you stopped crying. Feeling any better?"

I then remember why I was crying, and tears begin to gush out all over again.

~*~*~

About an hour later, I run out of tears. Dean found my iPod and portable Bluetooth speaker, then set it up on the coffee table in front of me. He also gave me a blanket, a box of tissues, a mug of hot chocolate, and permission to play whatever music I wanted.

After he set me up with all of this stuff, I thanked him.

I then slowly reached out and took the iPod.

The entire room was completely silent as I searched for the song I wanted to hear.

I selected it, and turned the volume up as loud as I dared.

Oh oh,

Oh oh,

Oh oh,

Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

I still feel a little choked up, but I sing my heart out anyway.

Don't talk, let me think it over

How we gonna fix this?

How we gonna undo all the pain?

Tell me, is it even worth it?

Looking through a straight line

Taking back the time we can't replace

All the crossed wires

Just making us tired

Is it too late to bring us back to life?

I don't have any family left.

Erin, what am I gonna do without you?

~*~*~

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V/C/F/S!

~Chey ;)