100 Ways to be a 'Douche'

#91-100 THE FINAL INSTALLMENT! *dun dun duuuun*

AN- So...after nearly a year...it's finished. *wipes away tear* Thanks so much everyone, for all the support and patience. I love you all so much! :')

XxX

91.) Refer to yourself in third person. All. Day. Nothing says douche like referring to yourself in third person all day. (Ex: VoodooDollie is a lazy bum that doesn’t post often. VoodooDollie feels sorry for her fans. VoodooDollie apologizes to any and all.) *Special thanks to PinkRabbit*

92.) Go to school and bother your friends by yelling their name repeatedly. Not saying, YELLING. When they finally look to you in irritation, just say ‘hi’. They’ll have thoughts of strangling you running through their heads. *Thank you for the awesome idea Whispy!*

93.) Speak as though you are in the Renaissance era. (THOU ART IN THE WRONG KINGDOM, KNAVE.)

94.) Purposefully ruin Disney movies for young children by putting a dark twist on them. (Ex: Finding Nemo is about a physically handicapped son who gets kidnapped by an evil man who plans to give Nemo to his demented daughter who enjoys torturing and murdering. It is up to Nemo’s father, a severely depressed man with anxiety issues to get the help from a mentally disturbed woman and stoners. You’ll ruin a childhood with that one.)

95.) Go up to a girl you hate and say the following: “Oh, I didn’t know girls participated in no-shave November.”

96.) Constantly speak in text chat. (“LOL THAT WAS SO FUNNY. WTF I FAILED A TEST? LOLUMAD?!”)

97.) Scream at someone and call them a Dovah. Force your friend to join in and say the following: “But there is one they fear…Dovahkiin, in their tongue. Dragonborn!” Then proceed to yell “FUS RO DAH!”, push the unsuspecting person down, then run away.

98.) Start a story on Wattpad, then never finish/update only once a year.

99.) Always lie about what you’re going to do. For example, I told you this book was going to give you 100 ways to be a douche. I lied. +10 to my morale.