Love After Life

Nineteen: Dance

(I changed the title of this story from Love after Death to Love after Life)

*Note: Expect that there are typos and wrong grammars here*

-:-

Malapit na kami sa bahay namin dito sa Candon. Isang kanto na lang ay makakarating na kami sa bahay. It's already Saturday in the morning and Iven decided to go here again to talk to my mom. He planned all this the day when he called my father. Hindi namin kasabay si ate dahil nauna na siya nung Thursday palang.

Nainis nga ako kay Iven dahil hindi man lang siya nagpa-alam sa parents niya bago kami pumunta rito. Pakiramdam ko tuloy ay magagalit sila sakanya dahil bukas na magaganap yung anniversary ball nila. He should be getting ready for it because it's a grand part but here he is, helping me with my family.

Actually, it was really thoughtful of him and I appreciated it also pero natatakot lang ako para sakanya dahil baka saktan siya ng tatay niya. Nagpa-alam lang siya sa ate niya at pumayag naman siya kaagad which I really find it cool. Siya na lang daw bahala kay Iven pero kahit ganoon ay hindi ko pa rin maiwasang mag-alala.

It's already eight o'clock in the morning and we're actually late than before. Kumain pa kasi si Iven sa isang fast food chain to have his breakfast bago kami tumuloy dito.

"Iven, salamat talaga at tinutulungan mo kami ngayon." Nakatayo na si Dad sa harapan ng bahay namin nung nakarating kami rito. He welcomed Iven like he was his son which made me smile too. Well, what can I say, dad is actually cool.

"Kumusta na po si Mrs. Privera?"

Even though dad is already kind and generous to him. Iven never set the formalities aside. He always calls my dad as Mr. Privera while my mom as Mrs. Privera. Kahit sabihin ni daddy na tito at tita na lang ang itawag sakanila ay hindi pa rin ginagawa ni Iven. Kaya siguro sumuko na lang si daddy. Peropwede namang daddy at mama na lang, mas madali pa 'yun.

"She's still not okay."

Malungkot na sabi ni daddy. Ginala ko ang tingin sa bahay at hindi na rin ako masyadong nalungkot nung pumasok ako ulit dito hindi tulad nung una. Maybe I already adjusted.

"Si Lorielle po?"

"She just bought something outside. Tara, kain ka muna ng breakfast. I know mahaba ang binyahe mo."

"Huwag na po. I already ate breakfast."

Hinayaan ko munang mag-usap sina Iven at daddy sa living room. Hindi ko naman kailangang pakinggan ang usapan nila eh. Pumasok na lang ako sa kuwarto ni mama para makita siya ulit. I missed her so much.

Napangiti ako ng tipid nang makita ko na naman siya na naka-upo sa dulo ng kama habang yakap-yakap ang journal ko. She was just looking blankly and it seems like she was thinking something deep. I don't know if there's something problem with my mom's mind. But I'm wishing there's none.

Ayaw kong mabaliw si mama dahil sa akin. I want her to witness ate's graduation first, watch my sister to get married and have a family. Mom is still young and mahaba pa ang buhay niya. I don't want her to end her life just because of me. How I wish I could say these words in front of her. But all I can do is to watch her and be dependent to Iven's help. Siya na lang talaga ang pag-asa ko.

Napalingon ako nang bumukas yung pinto at pumasok sina Iven, kasama na rin si ate.

She was just wearing a simple white tee and a cotton short with her hair tied in a ponytail. Ngumiti ako sakanya nang tumingin siya sa direksyon ko. I painfully closed my eyes when she walked right through me. Isang kaluluwa na lang talaga ako.