Rita's Review Shop

REVIEW ON OBSESSION BY RAJASREEgr143

REVIEW ON OBSESSION BY Rajasreegr143

This book tells the story of Isha, a super introverted girl, who falls in love with Ryan. Isha is left to discover her feelings for Ryan and if he ever knew of her existence.

COVER 📘

Now, your cover is beautiful, but it has nothing to do with your title. The title of your story is obsession. I think more can be done rather than just a beautiful flower. Also, the cover doesn't have the authors name on it, book covers should always have the authors name written on it for recognition. The font wasn't really good also, the dot of the I was a silhouette of a television. I think you cover needs more work.

TITLE 📘

Your title is nice and I don't think any other words would fit it more than the ones you have chosen. You have chosen a title that will hold your readers and call them to your book, short and intriguing, nice work.

BLURB 📘

Now you may need to work more on your blurb, probably rewrite it to get your readers to get more info about what your book is about. Sure, your title may have given them a heads up, but your blurb is what will draw them to your book. Your blurb is short and doesn't really tell your readers much about the drama to expect, yes, your book is named obsession and they know that fact, but what makes your book different from other Obsession related book? Why should they read your book? What have you planned out for them? tell your readers that.

PUNCTUATION/GRAMMER 📘

This is the main problem your story has, there are many punctuations being misused and also not showing where they should be. So instead of pointing out your errors which were much in this area, I will just state points to help you out with it.

📌When you are done with a sentence, don't give space before putting a period. Give space after that period before you start a new sentence.

I just woke up from sleep. I sat up on my bed...

Not

I just woke up from sleep . I rubbed my eyes.

📌Use a comma to introduce a text.

Example

I looked at her, "Are you serious?"

📌Use paragraph breaks to indicate a change in speaker

After a character finish speaking, always give a paragraph before the next character speaks.

"Just tell me the truth Anna," I urged.

"The truth about what?"

That paragraph is needed, it makes your work neat and doesn't cause confusion.

📌Use Single quotes when giving quotes inside a dialogue.

When you are quoting what another person has said earlier, you use a single quote.

"I told her not to go to the party, but she said 'I can do whatever I want' so I don't care anymore."

📌Periods and commas fall within closing quotation

📌Use a comma when a dialogue tag follows a quote.

Example

I stood up immediately, "What do you mean by that?"

📌No space should be given after an opening quotation mark before writing a word.

I think, if you use this tips you will improve greatly in your punctuations.

Your grammers need a little help too, as I found grammatical errors at places, there were also misspellings here and there. When going back in your book for editing, you should correct this, to not discourage your readers from going further into your book.

You should avoid, switching between presence and past tense. You could meet someone to help you go through it and help you with the process.

DESCRIPTION 📘

Your description was okay, but you should also work on that. I was able to get a little image on your characters and there surroundings, but not enough. You should work on describing your characters emotions more to the readers. When readers understand this better, they are then able to flow with your characters better.

CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT 📘

This was beautifully done, I just read the prologue and four chapters of your book and by the fifth, I had understood Isha character. I like how you were able to carry your readers along with your character.

Some authors make mistakes, dropping off too many characters, they forgetting about their readers. This was nicely done on your part. I like the characters that you brought to your book and their different personalities. Nice job on this.

But you may need to work on the scene where Isha family had guest over, there were just lot of names flowing over the place, I got confused.

OVERALL IMPRESSION 📘

This was a good read, and I enjoyed the short part of it that I read. I love how you were able to show the readers the relationship between Isha and her books. Because it was the books that brought her and Ryan together, I think it was beautiful that you wrote her story showing the characters falling in love through books.

I am still yet to see the Obsession part, I guess it's still early and you want to take your time with it, bringing it in slowly. I really like the type of writing you choose, your prologue started from the future and you started your chapter one bringing your writers to the past, I like reading books like that, and it's nice that at your prologue you held the readers at suspence. I am still waiting for that scene that happened in your prologue to understand better.

Work on your punctuation and grammer, do a little bit of touching on your book cover and blurb, you have a beautiful story, nice job.

              *********************

This review was to help you and nothing else, wishing you the best.