The Summer We Never Had (COMPLETED)

Chapter 10: Seventeenth

Chapter 10: Seventeenth

It's been eleven days since the last time I saw Haru. I've never seen him in my dreams neither in his house. He's been in MIA again.

I understand him though. I shouldn't expect that our shallow friendship will go deeper right away. It's not like we can forget what we have done in just a week or so. It's wrong and there's no way I can justify it myself. We need to fix the mess. Even if it means that it'll take time.

I get attached with people easily. Despite being a weird ass, once I get comfortable with the person, I'll cling onto him/her. I have a few friends and they are enough. I don't have plans adding a lot of people in my life. But Haru is an exemption. It's been a month since yesterday when I first saw him. We didn't have a lot of encounters but those meet ups were very meaningful for me. I just hope he feels the same way.

I think of him everyday since 'that thing' happened. It felt good in a wrong way. I was so disappointed in myself. Up until now. I am not mad at him. I just thought that we needed distance for a while. But eleven days have passed and there's still no Haru appearing in my dreams or across our house.

I want to see him now. I need to encourage him that we should forget about it. We must continue this friendship of ours. We must not waste our moments. Those can prevail the awkwardness we feel for each other.

And yes, another reason why I want to see him is that today is a special day for me. Today is my birthday. I didn't celebrate my past birthdays since my eleventh because of what happened to Asahi. But now, I think I can celebrate in a simple way. I can gladly accept the greetings without feeling guilty. I can thank them with all my heart.

I want him to greet me. He's not a weird stranger or unknown neighbor of mine anymore. He has a special place in my heart now. It kind of upsets me that we cannot cross the line, but still, it's more than enough. I like him. Romantically. But I know that this will fade and I just need to wait. Friendship is the better option for us. He must not cheat on his girlfriend. I must not tolerate it. We need to choose what's easier and better. I don't care about on how he feels for me. I don't care if he's attracted or not. I can't lose him just because of this.

I smiled genuinely after hearing them finished the birthday song. I looked at the chocolate in front of me which was made by Mama. I blew out the light of the candle and made a wish.

I just want to be free from the past. Let me live my life happily and grow into a better person. I can't lose anyone anymore.

"Mamimigay ba ng handa sa kapit-bahay, Ma?" Iyan kaagad ang naitanong ni Seika nang matapos kong mag-wish.

Sandaling natigilan si Mama, iniisip kung mamimigay ba. Hindi naman ganoon karami ang handa ko pero sobra ito para sa'min. Wala si Papa dahil nasa trabaho pero nag video call kami sa kaniya kanina. I'll just send him our pictures later.

"Huwag na lang siguro at baka magkatampuhan pa ang mga hindi mabibigyan," sagot ni Mama pagkaraan ng ilang sandali.

Natseika smirked. "Bigyan natin lahat ta's 'wag nating bigyan si bruha," banat niya. Umiling-iling na lang si Mama samantalang ako ay nagpipigil ng tawa. Siraulo talaga nitong babaeng 'to.

I feasted my eyes on the foods placed on our table. I want to give Haru some but I don't think it's a good idea. Magdadala na lang ako sa panaginip ko in case naroon siya. Baka kapag dalhan ko siya sa tapat ay mahataw lang ako ng sprinkler ni Mrs. Fujikawa.